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Why white men love the black woman

Posted by James, 31 Aug

Ever wondered why some white guys, love black women so much?

It seems that being a white male and proclaiming your attraction to black women (not only sexually, but also romantically) may lead to a lot of controversial and dangerous things. Let’s leave the debate of why more black women may be opening themselves up to white guys. The main focus of this debate is: why some white guys are opening themselves to black women. Let’s concentrate on that.

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Most white males don’t feel like they are running short of white women to marry. White males just marry at high rates. So question is: Why black women? The thing is it will not be fair to bundle up black women as one since everyone is their own person… be it in appearance or personality.

However, one thing that a white male friend of mine said… and I let him get away with bundling it all up is: “We love a black woman's confidence, her tenacity and her undeniable achievements in the face of great adversity...᾿ Since this info was coming from a man, there was definitely the mention of the lips, the curves, and that wonderful skin as well.

So what about stereotypes like “black women are either sexually conservative or total sluts?" Many people give so much lip service to interracial dating sites. You would think they have never done it. But those uptight individuals are the ones that spread these stereotypes. What happened to the highly educated black woman? How about the caring, decent and involved black woman?

Probably most white guys and others are confused with the stereotypical trash people spread around and if you are one that falls for such lame ol’ lines, then you sure as hell haven’t dated a black woman.

Bottom line, you don't have to sacrifice who you are for a white guy. They will love you anyway. Just be you and open yourself up… and if you like white guys, some white guy will find you too.

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8087 responses to "Why white men love the black woman"

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  1.   Laurelton says:
    Posted: 25 May 10

    Let me respond to the criticisms by Tatt and the "Older lady". With all due respect Tatt. You was on Big eyes ass for her exposing you for a white man rejecting on this board. It seems to me you don't practice what you preach. I am all for the holding hands and letting bygones be bygones. I am sincere about this. However, I am not going to participate in fake conversations like the old lady. You said " I entrenched myself here". I ain't run around saying " I dislike white men". Tatt you said this "Yet, when you constantly have a being like “Daffy” telling you something that may or MAY NOT be part of your world, it gets really old. I can’t speak for everyone here but I can tell anyone that cares to know that being “picked” is NOT that high up on my list of things to accomplish in my life. I figure if I continue along the path of making/keeping myself happy/content/joyous, there are bound to be others that want to come along for the journey. If not, then there is that old saying/”cliche” that fits oh so well…..”IT’S THEIR LOSS”…..PERIOD. I am sorry (NOT REALLY) that I don’t fit in this sad little box in which “Daffy” tries to most women of color. I am NOT out here “hunting” a man or any other such nonsense. I am not “bitter” about being a solitary creature…..have been this way since birth for the most part. And the fact is MOST women, by nature can easily adapt to what may or may not be going on for them at any particular time." I would agree with you, if you didn't say comments like "I don't even like these white men on this board". I do recall you saying that when you got rejected by AZ. To make matters worse, AZ said, he ain't want to be with you. AZ was more interested in Big eyes. You had a "war of words" with her. SIMPLY, because she noticed what I was saying. Tatt said this to me "He knows nothing of REAL love…..and is MASTER of EVERYTHING NEGATIVE…..he manipulates and drives wedges. Of course he could not understand how someone could simply (AND TRULY) let bygones be bygones. He certainly cannot fathom how someone can admit that they were wrong and move on from it with DIGNITY." But you "know about real love Mrs solitary creature". I don't manipulate nothing. All that shit that the older lady said to "Friendly". That was her own words. I didn't make that happen. NOW, they talking about planting and flowers. LOL Let's not talk about dignity Tatt. You would have let that Big eyes things go. She got a "new" man. I figure you might hate on that. Unity will never happen with sellout black women. You can blame "me", the white man, call each other "sis". It's the same black women that will tell men "they don't get along with other females". The old lady said this about me "Comment by PetiteChick on 25 May 2010: Well, well, well Mr. Laurelton. You may go on and on about my and Friendly’s run in, but you know what makes us BETTER THAN YOU? FAR BETTER THAN YOU, I MIGHT ADD….. FORGIVENESS. ADMITTING AND OWNING A WRONG, OWNING IT, DEALING WITH AND MOVING FORWARD." Who forgave who here? LOL Your weak ass apology to Friendly. I could see if you said "you know what, I ain't mean to say that to you". INSTEAD, you went overboard talking about she is the best mother in the world and something about ( I can't bother looking it up). Friendly, was a good mother before that. NOW, you want to lick and suck her ass. The fundamental difference between me and YOU. I stick by my statements PERIOD. A white men is not going to take her on with four kids. That is just how I feel about it. I am not going to talk about planting flowers and what I had for dinner with her. I will debate topics with her just like any "other woman here". You also said this "Some of us do and recognize the benefit it brings us all over constant hatred. How much does this consistent hatred weigh on you? I would imagine it’s about 10lbs extra on your shoulder than you need to carry. It seeps through your pores doesn’t it? It’s a stench that people can smell wherever you go." Listen, your an older lady and you go to church right? You should be the last to talk after that outburst you did at Friendly. The thread went out for awhile. I personally never seen a woman so angry at another woman. Tatt dead wrong for jumping on the bandwagon with you. I expect that from Tatt. Tatt picks and chooses her battles. I didn't see any Hi Fives with Big eyes LOL.However, you know better as an older woman. I will address the statistics and the excuses Tatt continues to make for numbers.

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  2.   PetiteChick says:
    Posted: 25 May 10

    @bamba CTFU @ Queenie awwwwwwww look at him. His feelings are hurt that we didn’t pay a compliment to him. Um Queenie you weren’t so mean today. There I paid you a compliment. Hope that makes you happy. Teeheeeheee

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  3.   PetiteChick says:
    Posted: 25 May 10

    @friendly Here's what I posted on or about April 26th. I think this was directed at OtherBrother cause he kept rambling on about some sort of statistics. NOTE THAT BLACK MEN ARE CHOSEN LAST BY ASIAN WOMEN. 2008 Black husbands: Married 4,190,000 black women – Married 310,000 white women – Married 39,700 Asian women. White husbands: Married 55,399,200 white women – Married 137,000 black women – Married 713,000 Asian women. Asian husbands: Married 2,790,000 Asian women. Married 193,000 white women – Married 8400 black women – www.USCensus.gov the American Community Survey of 2008 2006 Black Husbands Black Husbands Married 3,965,000 black women Black Husbands Married 286,000 white women Black Husbands Married 34,000 Asian women White husbands White husbands Married 50,224,000 white women White husbands Married 117,000 black women White husbands Married Asian 530,000 women Asian Husbands Asian Husbands married 2,493,000 Asian women Asian Husbands married 174,000 White women Asian Husbands married 6,000 Black women My personal observations to OtherBrother were as follows: As we can see there is a slight uptick in the numbers from 2006 to 2008. We are currently in 2010 so I would imagine that the numbers have grown, but not so f a s t… The term you use as “fastest growing” is irrelevant. The rate of inter racial couplings are increasing but can not be deemed “the fastest growing” based on the data just set forth in 2008. ----------------------- New Comment as of 5/25/2010 *Not so fast* because many African American WOMEN still hold out for Black men. But this trend is changing as evidenced by the numbers. The numbers will continue to flourish so long as race relations continue to improve. Prior Comments to Other Brother: The term “good man” is relative to the person having said discussion. You chose your wife because you knew she was good for you. As Bamba would choose a White mate who she deems good for her. That’s not a novel concept Other Brother. The same would hold true for me. You happen to be rare, much like Kingpin so eloquently agreed. You are lucky to have found a mate of your preference. Let’s hope we can all do that. Any individual who is lucky enough to find his her mate of choice is indeed a blessing. Your assertion that White men have always been ready and willing to date Black women is not so accurate either. Based on a number of factors. One being socioeconomic status, traditional vs. egalitarian views towards racial tolerance and always – at any given time in our country’s state of division. Research Data originally provided for OtherBrother: “…Social enterprise research conducted on behalf of the Columbia Business School (2005–2007) showed that regional differences within the United States in how interracial relationships are perceived have persisted: Daters of both sexes from south of the Mason-Dixon Line were found to have much stronger same-race preferences than northern daters did.[6] The study also observed a clear gender divide in racial preference with regards to marriage: Women of all the races which were studied revealed a strong preference for men of their own race for marriage, with the caveat that East Asian women only discriminated against Black and Hispanic men, and not against White men.[6] A woman's race was found to have no effect on the men's choices.[6] According to studies by Jenifer L. Bratter and Rosalind B. King made publicly available on the Education Resources Information Center, White female-Black male and White female-Asian male marriages are more prone to divorce than White-White pairings.[7] Conversely, unions between White males and non-White females (and between Hispanics and non-Hispanic persons) have similar or lower risks of divorce than White-White marriages.[7] My own observations given for OtherBrother The way this article reads, is that it is much more prevalent to see inter-racial couplings in states and areas with a higher degree of diversity (some northern states). I live in the epicenter of multiculturalism and I do not see this. But then again, New York State is huge. SO YOU ARE RIGHT, friendly, THERE ARE MORE MARRIAGES TAKING PLACE AMONGST BLACK WOMEN AND WHITE MEN. A little side note: Did y'all know that Roger Ebert (Movie Critic) has been married to a Black woman for many many years? He had a health problem some time ago which took him off the scene of "Roger and Ebert" Film Critiquing. Recently he won some sort of an award and his wife was with him, and she has been with every step of the way for YEARS. I think upwards of 25. SHE'S SO BLACK AND BEAUTIFUL!

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  4.   PetiteChick says:
    Posted: 25 May 10

    @tatted You're silly. You know I just wonder if he has like some "manly" things to discuss. Any male friends. You know, how men talk about video games, wrenches and tools and stuff like that. I just wonder why he would like to be here for over a year badgering women. Hell, men even get together and discuss women. Pity I tell ya! (hugs)

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  5.   PetiteChick says:
    Posted: 25 May 10

    Hi Menelik! What's good in London? It's a beautiful day in NYC. Did I say thank you? Best

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  6.   tatted2death says:
    Posted: 25 May 10

    nail on the head, Petite.... That is the image I get 90% of the time when I see him post.....Daffy Duck just shooting his own beak off.....over and over "WHOO HOOO, WHOO HOO, WHOO HOO".....LMAO have a good one, sis

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  7.   Malarki5 says:
    Posted: 25 May 10

    @ PetiteChick Good morning from London...11.16am over here. Menelik Charles

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  8.   PetiteChick says:
    Posted: 25 May 10

    @tatted: Where did you get "Daffy" from? CTFU as in the "DUCK?" You so silly. It's good to see you sis. Glad you are safe and happy! (hugs)

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  9.   PetiteChick says:
    Posted: 25 May 10

    @friendly: The statistics DO show an increase in the marriage rate. I posted a while back from I think between 2007-2008 which shows an average INCREASE of about 10,000 such new marriages amongst Black women and Caucasian men. I don't know if I kept it. If I did, I'll re-post. And yes, it does show that Asian women are marrying White men much more aggressively than Black women. But it doesn't discuss why! There is also a why! One thing for certain is that African Americans are only around 14% or less in the US. So, it would stand to reason that if there are more of them than there are of us, ummm, well yeah. They too suffer the stigma of marrying outside of their race, but not quite as bad as if they were to marry a BLACK MAN! Just thought I'd throw that lil tid bit in. If they marry outside of their race, it is much more acceptable for them to Marry a White man than a Black man. Well now, I dunno what that says, can you see some real preferences here with that? I do...... Here is my present concern for Black women and White men: THE STATE OF AFFAIRS IN THIS COUNTRY AS A WHOLE RIGHT NOW. While most progressives (Black and White) are steadfast there are various factions and movements that are taking place throughout the country that are getting uglier by the day. Of course racism exists everywhere, but because of our economic conditions the two wars (which are now on our new President's lap) has created such tension in race relations that if we don't get a handle on it, not only will there be class wars, but all out race wars. These are sad facts. Texas just instituted a law that would forbid teaching anything other than conservative ideals. That's not democracy that's dictatorship. Though states have a right to mandate their own laws. Arizona and this whole immigration thing too. So I look at things from a broader perspective. But YES, THERE was a gain. Let's just hope it continues to grow for those who want such relationships.

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  10.   tatted2death says:
    Posted: 25 May 10

    Oye Petite-sis..... Yes, we should just LOL as we "roll over" Daffy.....aw-dayum.....it might be time to change his moniker to "Wile E." (Coyote).....forever trying to "get" that dern roadrunner....LMAO. Peace

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  11.   PetiteChick says:
    Posted: 25 May 10

    Shout out to Danyco56 and Menelik! Good day gentleman!

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  12.   PetiteChick says:
    Posted: 25 May 10

    @Godiva and Bamba Them shows are scripted. Most reality shows are..... They not reality. People don't believe me when I tell them but they're not. Have you heard about the new on Omorosa and Trump are doing on TV-ONE? That will BE black! The brothers, dayummmmm. I'm just say'n. Didn't see any Latinos or Caucasians. The typical plot will for Omorosa to herself a man! Puhhleeeease. I'm with Godiva about that slobbering and sleeping with all those men, though I doubt they actually do that. I really doubt it. Reality shows are generally not reality in the sense we think. What they are is, filmed in real time, with cameras that follow but with a pre-determined script. Yepper. I have never ever been able to get into them. I tried, but it's not my thing. Bamba were they season endings or show endings? I know LOST I hear is one that is finito. It's about time if you ask me. Uggghhh, but it they make sista happy then da hells......rock on with yo bad self! ((hugs))

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  13.   PetiteChick says:
    Posted: 25 May 10

    @friendly13 Actually, I am a complete moron when it comes to flowers. I planted some seeds this year in a flowerbed I made a few weeks ago. They are starting to come up and I am so happy. I am thinking about planing some purple daffodiles by my steps against the steps. I like to buy the potting soil that guarantees to feed plants for upto 6 months. I just chop up the soil where I am going to put plants and mix a large bag of that soil on top and plant. If you are using a pot, I recommend terracota. Put some of that fertilized potting soil in there and plant bulbs, seeds, or starter plants and keep moist. ---------------------------------------------- Dang it, just when I thought I'd have summer guests. Oh well those flowers will do what they been doing. Bloom when they want to. I have tried every concoction I could think of bought and made for the bushes to fully bloom. Some of them are dead (rose bushes) and I must get rid of them. Ask me how much fun that's gonna be? LOL. OK, what I need to do if I want to have something on the porch as you mentioned with the terra cotta pots then is to buy something to put them on my porch. My porch area is not an outdoor porch. More like a sunroom. The sun sits right smack dab on my house. I'll have to pick things that won't die in that direct sunlight. Hey, you just gave me a project idea, while I look for work. I'll send you pics you tell me what you think. hugs

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  14.   PetiteChick says:
    Posted: 25 May 10

    @friendly I'm here....I'm staying. "himself" won't be scaring me. Himself is beginning to amuse me, honestly.

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  15.   PetiteChick says:
    Posted: 25 May 10

    @Tatted, OMG where you been sis? Yes, tatted we are moving forward REGARDLESS. Dignity he professes to have. More than a year doing this? Ok, hold up, wait a minute, wait just one doggone minute. A year? Oh shyt, teeheeeheeeee, sorry sis I'm not laughing at you. I'm laughing at all mighty one who hates ALL WOMEN. Only the goodness of God can help this man! Peace and Blessings, Tatted!

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  16.   PetiteChick says:
    Posted: 25 May 10

    Well, well, well Mr. Laurelton. You may go on and on about my and Friendly's run in, but you know what makes us BETTER THAN YOU? FAR BETTER THAN YOU, I MIGHT ADD..... FORGIVENESS. ADMITTING AND OWNING A WRONG, OWNING IT, DEALING WITH AND MOVING FORWARD. Now, you may not choose to live your life in this way, that's your bizznesssssss, but some of us do. If no one ever forgave YOU for anything YOU'VE EVER DONE, then where oh where would YOU BE? Will you come back and say, "I don't need nobody to forgive me" because I am RIGHT all the time. I WILL CALL YOU A LIAR. You don't sound like a man who has a lot spiritual depth either. That too is your biznesssss. Some of us do and recognize the benefit it brings us all over constant hatred. How much does this consistent hatred weigh on you? I would imagine it's about 10lbs extra on your shoulder than you need to carry. It seeps through your pores doesn't it? It's a stench that people can smell wherever you go. Hmmmph! KNOW THAT WE HAVE ALL MADE MISTAKES, DONE SOME WRONGS, SAID SOME THINGS WE WISH WE DIDN'T. WE CAN'T TAKE THE PAST BACK, BUT WHAT WE CAN DO IS LET GO AND MOVE FORWARD. Now have yourself a nice lil day, honey!

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  17.   tatted2death says:
    Posted: 25 May 10

    Hello Good People..(and "Daffy" and "marlarki"......j/k......lol) I see not much has changed around this place. But at the same time I truly appreciate the women here attempting to squash all the madness between us....People are effing people.....period. Most people have the same basic needs...Man, woman, white, black....whatever. And we all have the right to pursue those needs (within reason, of course). Yet, when you constantly have a being like "Daffy" telling you something that may or MAY NOT be part of your world, it gets really old. I can't speak for everyone here but I can tell anyone that cares to know that being "picked" is NOT that high up on my list of things to accomplish in my life. I figure if I continue along the path of making/keeping myself happy/content/joyous, there are bound to be others that want to come along for the journey. If not, then there is that old saying/"cliche" that fits oh so well....."IT'S THEIR LOSS".....PERIOD. I am sorry (NOT REALLY) that I don't fit in this sad little box in which "Daffy" tries to most women of color. I am NOT out here "hunting" a man or any other such nonsense. I am not "bitter" about being a solitary creature.....have been this way since birth for the most part. And the fact is MOST women, by nature can easily adapt to what may or may not be going on for them at any particular time. "Daffy" said his father didn't "teach" him anything about women......truer words he has NEVER typed in here. His "studies" have been self conducted over the course of his short and sheltered life. Anyone really feeling any sort of "enlightenment" by his pressence here his MOST DEFINITELY lacking something within.....plain and simple. I am tired of this character trying to make us believe that his words are based on anything other than his disdain for women in general. The fact that he has "rooted" himself here for more than a year now speaks volumes about his "agenda" and it's origins. He knows nothing of REAL love.....and is MASTER of EVERYTHING NEGATIVE.....he manipulates and drives wedges. Of course he could not understand how someone could simply (AND TRULY) let bygones be bygones. He certainly cannot fathom how someone can admit that they were wrong and move on from it with DIGNITY. Hey, maybe we should all "pretend" that he is "right" and that we will start limiting ourselves just for the hail of it. Peace and Blessings tatted2death P.S. Thanks for all the love whilst I was away.....Petite, friendly, godiva, bama.....thanks so much for holding it together here.

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  18.   MzBrOwNSuGaR says:
    Posted: 25 May 10

    @ Bamababe2k9 : Well girl after watching, you still think you will be into this season? I could only handle a few scenes lol

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  19.   Laurelton says:
    Posted: 25 May 10

    For the record I don't sew "discord". I just don't participate in fake conversations after blasting "the same woman" you had a problem with weeks ago. That's just me though.

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  20.   Laurelton says:
    Posted: 25 May 10

    Dear Friendly Na, your research his correct. What I am telling you for every "increase" for black women dating white men. Other "non black women" simply double lap you. I point out Asian women because the statistics show they nearly double the rate of black women when it comes to dating white men. Um, I don't think the Asian female population in the "United States" outnumbers African American women. Simply put, black women are picked last by white men.

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  21.   friendly13 says:
    Posted: 25 May 10

    @ PetiteChick You asked ".... are you good with wandering roses and tiger lilies, daffodils? Forget the daffodils those perennials are gone for the season." Actually, I am a complete moron when it comes to flowers. I planted some seeds this year in a flowerbed I made a few weeks ago. They are starting to come up and I am so happy. I am thinking about planing some purple daffodiles by my steps against the steps. I like to buy the potting soil that guarantees to feed plants for upto 6 months. I just chop up the soil where I am going to put plants and mix a large bag of that soil on top and plant. If you are using a pot, I recommend terracota. Put some of that fertilized potting soil in there and plant bulbs, seeds, or starter plants and keep moist.

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  22.   friendly13 says:
    Posted: 25 May 10

    @ PetiteChick and all the sistas on here We have to stick together. We can't let these brothers get on here and start sowing discord. We've got to squash that.

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  23.   friendly13 says:
    Posted: 25 May 10

    @ Mr. Laurelton Queens If the trend remains consistent with the increase between 1980 thru 2002 there was a 3,000 per year increase during the 12 year span. So do you know what that means Mr. Laureltong Queens....? That means that since 2002 eight more years has passed and the increase would be up to approximately about 116,000 marriages in 2010. My theory is that the increase is about sixty-thousand more than that. I will have to test my hypothesis though or find some more emperical evidence to support my hypothesis. I will get back with you on that after I have performed my research. Lol.

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  24.   friendly13 says:
    Posted: 25 May 10

    @ Laurelton Queens The Asian community is ten times larger than the white population and many times over the black population. So, it is no wonder that there are more asian women with white men. Besides that asian women are very sweet and beautifl, it is not wonder that any kind of man would fall in love with them when the opportunity arises. Never the less, asian women are not white women so that is still a plus for black women because it shows that white men don't just only prefer white women but are open to all ethnicities of women and that is a good thing for black women too.

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  25.   MzBrOwNSuGaR says:
    Posted: 25 May 10

    was wondering where my sweetie queens was... gosh i never thunk i wud use the words queens and sweetie in the same sentence lol

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  26.   Bamababe2k9 says:
    Posted: 25 May 10

    @MzBrown I am ALL about the Bachelor and the Bachelorette this summer but I agree. I think I keep watching in the hopes that one of the sistas will be picked one day but it's getting to the point now that you don't even see ONE minority face on there (Asia,Hispanic or black). But I still watch and hope and I like a good storyline. I'm a Sex and the City fan too. @Queenie awwwwwwww look at him. His feelings are hurt that we didn't pay a compliment to him. Um Queenie you weren't so mean today. There I paid you a compliment. Hope that makes you happy.

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  27.   Laurelton says:
    Posted: 25 May 10

    (Stepping in the door) I leave and I see the "coonery" going on. Before I even talk to Danny, who seems like old black women that dislike white men. Friendly said this, "Comment by friendly13 on 24 May 2010: Hey, everybody…I was reading an online article that discusses the increase in balck women marrying white men and a possible reason why “…Statistics show that more Black women are dating White men. Black female/White male marriages went from 27,000 in 1980 to 80,000 by 2000, according to the U.S. Census Bureau." Stop bringing up 2002 articles Asian women double lap black women when it comes to dating white men. Good day.

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  28.   MzBrOwNSuGaR says:
    Posted: 25 May 10

    Comment by Bamababe2k9 on 24 May 2010: I was eating then lol I never got into Law and Order. I’m going to watch the end of Dancing with the Stars tonight and then the Bachelorette. ----- I can remember the first Bachelor and Bachelorete shows and still watch them some, but I gotta admit they are such a farce in so many ways. I think what makes me so sick about them is after all these shows, never have they used a black bachelor or bachelorette. Also, they will put one or two blacks on as the contestants, just like they gonna be the one get picked. YEA RIGHTTT!! I want to see and all black cast grrrrrr!! LOl And then to, in all those dating shows, how, in a matter of a few days, are you gonna find real love when you swapping nasty kisses and sleeping with different people all at the same time. This girl they have on this time was soooo in love with the last bachelor, but she didn't want to give up her job staying on the show. I thought she made a bright choice, seeing as how there was no guarantee she was gonna get picked anyway. Butttt, she is back!!! lol They have had only one or two marriages from all those shows I think.

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  29.   MzBrOwNSuGaR says:
    Posted: 25 May 10

    Comment by dannyco56 on 24 May 2010: Sorry about posting almost same post twice. ====== I have noticed the doulbe post happens every one in a while. A glitch in the system I guess.

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  30.   MzBrOwNSuGaR says:
    Posted: 25 May 10

    comment by godiva61 on 24 May 2010: "Hey Bama, and Ms. BrownSugar, Brown Sugar, one of my favorite Rolling Stones Songs!" Hi there godiva. I have never been a Stones fan, so it was quite a while before I even knew they had the song. Because of my nic, so many mentioned the song, so I decided to google the lyrics. I have to say I don't care for the message at all. I dunno, maybe I'm missing something, lol

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  31.   Bamababe2k9 says:
    Posted: 24 May 10

    I was eating then lol I never got into Law and Order. I'm going to watch the end of Dancing with the Stars tonight and then the Bachelorette. End of American Idol is tomorrow night. I got some other work to do as well.

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  32.   PetiteChick says:
    Posted: 24 May 10

    @friendly, Ms. Godiva I'm buying that CD on Wanda Jean Allen. yepper. I never saw the beginning. I was mesmerized by that whole thing.

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  33.   PetiteChick says:
    Posted: 24 May 10

    @Bamba Is all this talk of cooking make you hungry too? The last episode of Law and Order (for life) is coming on tonite. I'm sick to death. However, all is not lost. There will be a Law and Order Los Angeles style. I miss Jack McCoy. I have a thing for smart men! I think that's why their ratings went down and after Detective Green left. Then I still have that fine looking (smart again) Vincent D'Anafrio to swoon over on reruns.

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  34.   PetiteChick says:
    Posted: 24 May 10

    @friendly Thank you for standing up for me, girl! *hugs*

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  35.   PetiteChick says:
    Posted: 24 May 10

    Godiva............... My freedom rider! No left overs. Nope, sorry. I gotta eat them badboys tonite. It took me a long time to figure out how to cook for two. And sometimes I still don't get it right. Overcook is typically what happens. But I know one thing though. Son will be doing much more cooking than he used to. He doesn't have the schedule he used to and mama is gonna stop all that cooking and let son go for himself some. I made sure to cook cause the po child was full time schooling/heavy load toward the end and part time work. Ummm, let's see I was going to school too. I'm ready to "chill." One thing I do love about the summer (except Lightening storms and mosquitoes) is the grill. Charcoal. I don't like those gas fired grills I love the taste of charcoal!

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  36.   PetiteChick says:
    Posted: 24 May 10

    Comment by friendly13 on 24 May 2010: A little gardening suggestion for those of you who live in the big city…..I saw a pretty garen arrangement in a magazine article recently, forgot whichone though…herbs,green onions, and a leafy lettuce arranged prerfectly in a large tarracotta pot. Goes great on a balcony or doorstep. I started my gardens in large foil pans. I lined the bottom with some small rocks for drainaige then filled the pans with gardening soil and made rows to plant. Now, I am about to take everything out and put them in the big garden I was working on yesterday after Church. Now all I need is some salad dressing and we are going to be right this summer. --------------------------------------- Alrighty then. When can you come? I have plenty of room for the kids, no excuses!!!! LOL.

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  37.   godiva61 says:
    Posted: 24 May 10

    @Scoff/Sarah, As always it's a pleasure and a blessing to hear from you!! I hope all is well with the families!! Scoff are you doing any fishing? Too much oil in the water for me right now!! Sarah, I am so glad that your daughter is recovering, what a agonizing feeling to see your child in pain!!! Went through something similar a couple of years ago. She has good Mom, so I knew she would be fine!! Please keep in touch, okay. Also, Ms. SeWilde sends her love and greetings!! love godiva

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  38.   godiva61 says:
    Posted: 24 May 10

    @dannyco56, Hi There!! Just wanted to say hello and to thank you for being a true gentlemen!! It is much appreciated and welcomed! We may not always agree, but we can agree, to disagree with common courtesy towards one another, is a great feeling!! Again, Thank you and Welcome aboard!!! love godiva

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  39.   godiva61 says:
    Posted: 24 May 10

    @Ms.friendly13, Hey Ms. Lady, how are you? Thanks for the info on Wanda Jean Allen. When I first encounterd her story, I was fascinated, yet saddened. Can you imagine if the Country would have had health care reform back then? Wanda would have benifited greatly and her situation might had been prevented if she would have had the proper medical care that was greatly missing in her life, so sad!! It was a sad story in every aspect, even sadder that she was only 41yrs young when she died. She was, I thought quite attractive as well. Makes you appreciate the blessings in your own life, doesn't it?? Hey Ms. Petite, how are you this Monday, no leftovers, huh?? Okay I'll settle for some Yankee Tickets(lol). Huge Yankee Fan, even though they are on a little losing streak. Hey Bama, and Ms. BrownSugar, Brown Sugar, one of my favorite Rolling Stones Songs!! I hope that EVERYONE here had a pleasant and productive day!!!!!!! love godiva Hi Ms.Tatt wherever you are!

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  40.   friendly13 says:
    Posted: 24 May 10

    A little gardening suggestion for those of you who live in the big city.....I saw a pretty garen arrangement in a magazine article recently, forgot whichone though...herbs,green onions, and a leafy lettuce arranged prerfectly in a large tarracotta pot. Goes great on a balcony or doorstep. I started my gardens in large foil pans. I lined the bottom with some small rocks for drainaige then filled the pans with gardening soil and made rows to plant. Now, I am about to take everything out and put them in the big garden I was working on yesterday after Church. Now all I need is some salad dressing and we are going to be right this summer.

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  41.   PetiteChick says:
    Posted: 24 May 10

    @MsFriendly I shall send you a ticket to NY for working in the yard. I shall pay ye. Teeheeheee I don't have a garden of veggies but are you good with wandering roses and tiger lilies, daffodils? Forget the daffodils those perennials are gone for the season.

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  42.   PetiteChick says:
    Posted: 24 May 10

    I love to do ribs and chicken wings on the grill. I will share some of my techniques. Of course I learned these techniques from old church mothers, I will admit. Before I marinate my meat, I soak it all in salt water. Then I drain off the salt water and soak my meat in coke and burbon four about 25 to 45 minutes prior to seasoning. Then I lay my meat out flat, folding the wingtips back into a triangle, and season with a ginger, seasoned salt (preferable lowery’s), then a final heavily dust with black pepper. Then I take them out and just let the meat smoke on the grill for about two hours or so. I make a olive oil sprinkling mixture with some of the coke, seasoned salt, ginger, and pepper to keep the meat from drying while cooking. I sprinkle after turning. When done, delicious tender and juicy. The burbon and ginger it think give these ribs a little individuality. I am really ready for this warm weather…I have little starter gardens going already. Me and the boys love salad. so, I put insome different kinds of leafy lettuce, tomatoes, onlions, carrots, cucumbers. I can hardly wait. I also planted some okra(I heard it is good for the heart)and herbs too. Yesterday, I planted some greenbeans and I am supposed to be putting out some greens today, but I will see. Okay, I’ll be waiting for some cooking tips….. -------------------------------------------------- Umm, what time do I arrive ova at yo place? Talking about marinating stuff, LOL. Sounds good. Cooking tips? You would think I'd have some considering all my family is from the Souf....(Virginia). I can give you a tip about them ribs though, you say you use salt (I can't). What I do however, is use Mrs. Dash's Chipolte Blend to season when pre-cooking. I par-boil them a bit on top of the stove with this and the no sodium Goya Achiote y Cilantro. I cook them just until that time. I can't give it minutes I have to poke a fork to know. Take em out and add more seasoning let them brown in oven - go back and then add sauce. Continue to cook until they dang near falling off the bone! I love em that way. Now string beans, I used to season with some sort of smoked meat (traditional way my fam used to do it). No can do anymore. So, now Instead I get fresh green beans and either saute them atop the stove with a lil garlic and EVO and this takes a couple of goes since my cast iron pot usually doesn't allow for the sauteing of all of them at once. I especially like them this way because they have snap to them still. If I put them on the stove (which is what my son prefers), I add mushrooms (before my sister died) I got that recipe from her. They are really good alternatives for me, as I must watch salt intake. I do miss seasoning with smoked meat. Dammit. I sneak every now and then and do it, but I don't do it often. I retain water so much you wouldn't believe. Stick a needle in me and watch me pop.... I also do fresh spinach sauteed and I add fresh ginger and garlic. My son loves this as much as I do. Last nite's dinner with MAC and cheese, OMG you know that mac and cheese is sinful. Lordy. All those calories. But good doggone it!

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  43.   PetiteChick says:
    Posted: 24 May 10

    @friendly to your point about education, yes we tend to want someone with the same level of educational experience that we have attained. That's so true. @bamba your point is well noted as well about Black women in college. Indeed! This is why it is so important to share the info and tell somebody something that may be able to help them. There ain't nothing wrong with a woman who wants someone with the same educational achievement. Although my husband chose me despite the fact that he had more credentials than I did. But for us women, we don't want to clean up men anymore, fix em up and try and make them into something. I have girlfriends older and younger who are not going to be doing this anymore. They will either do without and marry their careers, hold out for the one they want in terms of race or look elsewhere. I can't say I'm a hold out necessarily. Because my dating preferences do include other ethnicities. I have Puerto Rican family members and I love my Brown folx too!

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  44.   PetiteChick says:
    Posted: 24 May 10

    @MsFriendly Comment by friendly13 on 24 May 2010: Hey, everybody…I was reading an online article that discusses the increase in balck women marrying white men and a possible reason why “…Statistics show that more Black women are dating White men. Black female/White male marriages went from 27,000 in 1980 to 80,000 by 2000, according to the U.S. Census Bureau. The reason for this increase in more Black women dating White men may be attributed to educational attainment, says Renea D. Nichols-Nash, author of Coping With Interracial Dating. “A study revealed that the number of Black women earning degrees increased by 55 percent since the mid `70s, but 20 percent with men,” says Nichols-Nash, a journalism professor at Arizona State University. “Women who go to college and graduate want someone with the same educational level or more. Black men just aren’t there. That could be one reason why more Black women are dating White men.”” (retrieved on May 24, 2010 from http://findarticles.com/p/articles/mi_m1355/is_10_102/ai_91088599/?tag=rbxcra.2.a.44) ------------------------------------------ This is good news! Excellent on the front for women who want marriage. *recalling a scene from a Wayan's Brothers Flick* "You stay dropping knowledge - you ought to be teaching or something." Ooops, but you already do! *hugs*

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  45.   PetiteChick says:
    Posted: 24 May 10

    Sister Friendly, is dropping knowledge y'all, PAY ATTENTION!

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  46.   PetiteChick says:
    Posted: 24 May 10

    Ladies: I ain't got no leftovers for ya! LOL.

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  47.   PetiteChick says:
    Posted: 24 May 10

    @dannyco56: @PetiteChick, Thank you for your kind response. I have read many of your posts and understand that you have no attraction to pale skinned American men. I respect that and I respect you and your right to like who you choose to like. I also respect your opinions and your advice to your sisters. I think that it is good advice for any young woman or any woman for that matter to take their time in any relationship with any man. We do not fall in love with someone at first glance. It is more likely to be lust than love. Love takes time you have to get to know the person where they have been and where they are planning on going in a relationship. Slow is always better when you are thinking about spending a lifetime with someone. I do not mind if you have an opinion that may differ from mine. I respect your opinion, even if I may not agree. But I have not read anything that you have written that made me upset or angry. From what I have read you have been pretty open and honest with your opinions and your comments. I stay pretty busy and may not post very often but will try to answer those who respond or have questions. ------------------------------- Thank you! I respect you too. I respect all who don't belittle or demean. I would not imagine that you would be perturbed by my desire not to seek out a relationship with Caucasian men. I say this because there are so many beautiful African American women here. Do you agree? Dannyco56, I would much rather refer to you as Caucasian or White. Pales-skinned can be African American (we come in lovely hues); Latin American, Mulit-cultural, etc. My reasons for not seeking such with Caucasian gentlemen at this time does not mean I shall never REVISIT the thought. I have dated a couple, and I guess most of it comes from my inexperience with it. Two short term (not even) doesn't give me enough breadth of knowledge about what it is like to date your ethnicity. That is all there is to that. When I arrived here on this forum I felt as though those of us women who are "new" to inter racial dating may be being taken advantage of. I assumed incorrectly in this regard and soon discovered that the lovely sisters you see who post here and elsewhere have a wealth of experience dating Caucasian men. I likened it to freshman kids being picked on at their first day of school by those more senior to them, a ritual of sorts that many go through in school. LOL. I don't have the wealth of experience and thought I was doing a "service" by telling my sisters this. However, as I noted, they are "Grown and Sexy." Another factor is that I've never dated a great deal. I had was married for 20 years and after that marriage (to a Black man - who is the father of my son) I had one long term relationship with another and then some sporadic dating here and there which really didn't amount to much. I looked up one day and things had changed so fast, so quickly (I wasn't looking) and decided that perhaps I should try and get on the bandwagon. LOL. I did when I arrived here at one point, but all I came upon were those men who I found only wanted sexual relationships. That is not what I'm seeking because it is not what I am accustomed to. So, that is the reason. Because I tend toward "partnerships" more so than anything else, I found this unappealing to me. It is nice to have a conversation with someone with civility so that the purpose of our writings are not for naught. Thank you for listening!

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  48.   friendly13 says:
    Posted: 24 May 10

    @ PetiteChick Hey, good to see you. I was wippedout again yesterday after working in my garden. I was able to do a little catching up today. Holla.

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  49.   friendly13 says:
    Posted: 24 May 10

    Oh, I wanted to add to a comment I made earlier today about black people being influenced when they are exposed to college and intellectual settings. Even though I believe that being in these settings does cause people to look past color relationship wise it does not erase the fact that racism still exists. Just because two people are inlove doesn't mean that hateful people cease to exist or to cause people problems who choose to be different. I think that it is sometimes a good thing because racism is something that white people tend not to experience until they get involved with a person from a different race and have children that are not considered white. Look at all that our president is facing and his mother is white. But because our country has been socialized to think that a black man is not capable, there are those who constantly poke at him and nit pick at him because he is black. Our President is both white and black. But all that some people can see is the color of his skin and the fact that one of his parents is black. I don't bring this up to cause an angry discussion but just to point out that even though there are white men who enjoy being in relationships with black women and women like me who defy the odds to be with them there are still realities that we need to accept in order to know what we could be up against. I mean look at all the hate that women like me on here have gotten from black men because of our choice. That just goes to show that opposition is still there. But we have to be strong and listen to what our hearts are telling us.

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  50.   PetiteChick says:
    Posted: 24 May 10

    Good day my lovely sisters! It's good to see you all (((hugs))) There are so many posts. I will not leave anyone out. I wanted to give my girls to have an opportunity for the men to speak. Dannyco56, you are a breath of fresh air!

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