Why some Black women only date White Men

Posted by James, 17 Jan

We always talk about Black women and how they can’t date White men. Well, there are those black women that only date White men. I remember a pal of mine telling me once that she will never get married to Black man. And even as kids, when playing make believe, she was always married to a White guy.

The reason for women like her who only date white men may be very similar to the reasons why most Black women only date Black men … attraction. Some also feel that Black men treat them better than any other man ever could, and they feel that they'd rather have what they know instead of experimenting with what they don’t know.

Find your soulmate on InterracialDatingCentral

Some Black women are just not physically attracted to Black men. And as much as parents usually like hooking us up with people of our own race, well it reaches a time when you have to be honest with yourself. Imagine my pal for example: As a child, her first crush was Adam Sandler, then as she got older, she fell in love with Mel Gibson. This doesn’t mean that Black men aren’t handsome – they are just not her type.

Some also feel that White men (not ALL but many) find black women to be remarkable in every sense of the word; hence Black women tend to gravitate towards those affections. Much as her husband treats her better than any man ever had, one lady admits that she has been with some White men that disgusted her with their behaviors. But she says that generally, older White men and very mature on a broader level than with Black men on many levels.

Some are just wildly turned on by the differences … skin color, hair, being raised in different cultures, music, foods … the list is endless. Its all about the desire for the mysterious and unknown. And for some, its just pure love because there are those that forget that we are ‘black’ and ‘white’ and just coincidentally happened to fall in love with a White guys.

One thing we all have to remember is that not every White man is a Black woman’s dream. It all depends on the individual … good and bad comes in all colors.

With that said, the generic phrase - ‘It should be about love and not color’ – is cute. But in this case, not entirely truthful. Its not only about love. Much as love gets cultivated eventually, there is physical attraction and a declaration to date only one race. Racist or preference?

1841 responses to "Why some Black women only date White Men"

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  1.   honey_bee03 says:
    Posted: 02 Apr 11

    A man is a man....lol His color has nothing to do with it. You get the good and the bad in ALL races and ethnicities. Some do have their preferences, but you should not close your mind to a person based on their race. You never know the one for you may be the one you closed your eyes too. You never know who God is going to send to us, or in what package either....

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  2.   dizzydean69 says:
    Posted: 27 Mar 11

    I date who I am attracted to simply put. I have no reason to date a black man because he is the same race. Now because I am attracted to white men does not mean white men are superior or better than a black man. The contrasts for me in skin color are not that drastic I am not turned on by the skin thing like other women have said. I seek out a like minded man so we have the same interests so the opposites attract idea is not relevant. I want to be happy and I know being happy in a relationship is having white man for my mate.

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    • Posted: 03 Apr 11

      @DizzyDean69 I like what you said and the way you said it,honey.That is what being an adult is all about,making your on choices that work for you in life no matter what anyone else thinks.It's you life,follow your heart and live it the way you want. EddyReady/BigTen cares !

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  3.   Christa2 says:
    Posted: 25 Mar 11

    Sorry.I meant are to DIE for not dye for lol

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  4.   Christa2 says:
    Posted: 25 Mar 11

    I am a black woman and i must admit that i find white guys(though not all)very attractive.The reason as to why black women date white guys is not only cos of their feelings but also the fact that these guys are different from us.I personally love the contrast of their skin colour(black annd white).Oh and by the way,the mixed kids gotten from a black and white couple are to dye for.

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    • reese says:
      Posted: 01 Aug 11

      now that says self hate if you think biracial kids are better looking because they are lighter with non african features. You sound like you are trying to delute your race. And I date outside my race.

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  5.   951HONEY says:
    Posted: 20 Mar 11

    I date who and what I like and that is only answer that people need. We are grown men and women on this site and we do not have to explain our attractions to any one race. A man is a man and that is all that matters. We all want relationship that makes us happy and fulfilled. So let's move on to the next topic.......

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  6.   rachybaby says:
    Posted: 20 Mar 11

    You aforgot to mention that some black women date white men out of self-hate. Of course the phrase, "It's about love, not colour" is misleading...it's ONLY true for those willing to date within their own ethnicity too.

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    • Sxybrwnsuga says:
      Posted: 05 May 11

      It's funny how when it's a black woman dating outside her race it's because she has self-hate. LOL please me more credit than that. I love being black and who I date doesn't define how much I love my race. Get a clue this is 2011 stop with the stereotypes.

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    • onetreehill says:
      Posted: 20 Jun 11

      Self-hate? Very interesting comment. I think I know what you mean. Hate may not be the correct term. However, you did say "SOME" black women.

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  7.   justsaying says:
    Posted: 20 Mar 11

    It would be nice if interracial dating didn't focus on race so much. Like there has to be some other reason to why she will only date a white man other than she likes him, or the question I am tired of seeing " why white men love black women." I usually see tons of questions to be answered when a black woman is in the relationship with a white guy, and so much of having to explain yourself.

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    • Posted: 03 Apr 11

      @JustSaying I agree with you,pretty lady.How about talking about all the good times they have together and why they like each other so much and maybe we can all really learn from it.EddyReady/BigTen cares !

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      • justsaying says:
        Posted: 05 Apr 11

        It would be nice to know why individual couples like each other. I hate separating people. White man/black women isn't the only interracial couples out there. People have their reasons to why date they who they do, but it shouldn't be just racial.

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  8.   pushoverbig says:
    Posted: 19 Mar 11

    My name is Rich.I have been dating black women for 5 years .And i do not date white women.My last woman 6 years ago was white. But I'm looking for a black woman and do not know how about to find a black woman? I live in warren OH and there is nothing to do here .But go out to eat ..How do i find a black woman and how do i know if she is in to white men???

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    • HappyPhoenix says:
      Posted: 06 Apr 11

      Rich,I hope that you don't think that finding a black woman will solve all your problems. I don't know about Warren , Ohio, but isn't Cincinnati filled with Black woman? As far as finding a woman( any woman), be confident and approach one. All she can do is say "yes" or "no".

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      • GoddessLadyS says:
        Posted: 19 May 11

        I agree with Happy, Rich, however, I have lived in Cincinnati, and that is 4 hours away from you. I would try Youngstown, Oh or even stretch your search up to Michigan. Best of luck. Just don't stop at black women. Open to all others of color also.

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    • parker143200 says:
      Posted: 24 Jul 11

      Hi pushoverbig, If you see a BW that you are attracted to just say hello tell her that you htink she is beautiful and would like to get to know her better get her phone number and ask her out on a date. Most women will respond positively to sincerity.

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  9.   pushoverbig says:
    Posted: 16 Mar 11

    I'm 30 years old and i dated black women and And i do not date white women .And I'm looking for a black woman to date maybe more? And some black women A not into dating white men .But I'm looking for someone to live my life with and have kids with .And i do not know how about go about finding a black woman ????

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  10.   NOPLAYER says:
    Posted: 15 Mar 11

    @ bookworm32 - I see why any man would be attracted to you, YOU'RE A VERY ATTRACTIVE WOMAN! (no flirt intended) I guess it's no different then when alot of BW didn't give dark complexioned BM the time of day, if he didn't look like Al B. Sure, Christopher Williams or El DeBarge a brother didn't have a chance. It wasn't until Hollywood, entertainment or the sports industry made dark skinned brothers fashionable in the eyes of alot of BW with the emergence of brothers like Weasley Snipes, Morris Chestnut, Tyson Beckford and Micheal Jordan, then it became cool to want a dark skinned brother. It looks like a case of what goes around comes around. Both BM and BW have gotten caught up in letting others define what is attractive to us and what is not. Look at the imagery that bombards us everyday all day long during our adolencent years while our minds are developing and forming opinions based off of what we see. They say seeing is believing because if you see something so long enough then you start to believe what you see and the subtle message attached to the thing you see. I believed Jesus was a white man while growing up because I'd never seen him depicted as anything but white, so this goes to show that if you see something long enough it'll sink in on you and you'll accept it for what it is. White or very light skin always been partryed as the standard of beauty in just about everything we see even in blk magazine they just recently as 15 years ago started adding dark skinned women in the advertising and if she was dark skinned she had to have long shoulder lenght hair and she couldn't be too full-figured, with a broad nose or thick lips. Too many of us have internalized other peoples standards and ideals of beauty and takiing hold of the old, " if your light your alright but if your blk then stay back" foolishness and some of us are crazy enough to select a mate on the virtues of that foolishness and all of the stereotypes that are attached to skin color. Before I got married I had to do some serious soul searching to make sure I wasn't about to make a life long decision based on some preconceived notion or media hype. I wanted to know in my heart that I was marrying a women and not some fantasy or prevailing myth attached to her and I didn't want to be wrapped up in skin complexion or eye color or none of the superficial stuff because after looking at it for so long it ceases to even attract your attention and beside you can't build a life together based on that alone. It's natural to be attracted to what we see but we have to look deeper than what we see because trust me alot of people are caught up in the prevailing sexual myths associated with those with certain physical features and I've been around long enough to know that "every thing that gliters aint gold!" Other than that, love the one thats trying to love you and the rest will take care of itself! Peace

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    • HappyPhoenix says:
      Posted: 06 Apr 11

      I have been reading your post for years and you are "deep" I am a direct person and I can appreciate your communication style! LOL.......I know that "deep" is cliche.

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    • reese says:
      Posted: 01 Aug 11

      I am surprised to hear that. Me and all of my friends were always attracted to darker skinned brothers, but they were with light skinned women. I didn't know that dark skinned brothers came against the same color preference inn some parts of the country. But I agree I am not going out of my way to be anything other than myself and men from other races are more often attracted to me.

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  11.   32Bookworm says:
    Posted: 14 Mar 11

    I'm attracted to men who are attracted to me! Enough said. I date men who find my African features and skin tone beautiful. Black women are well aware of what Black men view is desirable as a collective. And it is not the "typical" Black women, but Black women who appear to have a mixed racial background. For me, its not about race, but who generally finds me desirable. White men who date Black women usually are attracted to women who have "typical" African features.

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  12.   eagertomeet says:
    Posted: 11 Mar 11

    I am a White British Male and have been dating black woman for the best part of 30 years- that is my attraction and I am more than happy with that- I am going back to the early 1980's when in London you did not see many mixed race couples- yes you did get some looks but when you're over 6' as I am and together with one of my hard stern looks, that would always be sufficient to make sure that nobody would dare challenge me- today of course it is more common- I have contacts on the other side of the Atlantic so I have had the opportunity to have dated lovely black woman from both the UK and the US- my message to all of you on this site is be true to yourself regardless of you're race- do not be afraid to date outside of you're own colour- if other people black or white object then you make sure you stamp on there bigotry and ignorance in an assertive manner- have the courage of you're convictions.

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  13.   HollyM says:
    Posted: 06 Mar 11

    A lot of very profound comments on this topic.. Good food for thought. I personally appreciate a respectful gentleman, in whatever shade he is meant to be.

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  14.   bookitty123 says:
    Posted: 03 Jan 11

    I find it awesome that so many more American black women are choosing to date outside the 'race.' When you think about it we are all one race, which is human. I have been attracted to men of all races but as all girls see themselves marrying the guy they want to be with, the one I've pictured has always been a white guy. The world needs contrast. Otherwise how would we develop our preferences? I may very well end up falling in love with a black guy. I'm open to all of life's possibilities. I'm just being honest when I say that's unlikely. That said, I don't find just any white guy potentially compatible...just because he's white. A girl's got standards. And I don't expect him to want me just because I'm black. At the end of the day, we have to mesh as humans. Real love is hard to find whatever color you happen to come in!

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  15.   CJeleven says:
    Posted: 26 Dec 10

    Just to chime in here... I've been attracted to all races, but I seem to end up dating white guys. idk why, but I do love looking into bright eyes!

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    • Cynamyn82 says:
      Posted: 28 Dec 10

      CJeleven, Green, blue, and gray eyes are my weaknesses, which is another reason why I'm attracted to white men.

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      • TexasT1 says:
        Posted: 29 Dec 10

        For me, the physical differences are a huge attraction. I am white w/green eyes. Black women seem to be drawn to me like I am to them. Every one makes a comment about my eyes. I like the way black women are very individual, have strong personalities, and I think the differences in our physical makeup produce explosive sexual and emotional bonds. I have dated all races...but always end up steering towards the beautiful black woman in the crowd. Just waiting for the day I find that one I can't live without...

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        • Cynamyn82 says:
          Posted: 02 Jan 11

          You need to come my way, TexasT1 =P Yeah I get lost in bright-colored eyes. I can't help it.

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          • TexasT1 says:
            Posted: 27 Jan 11

            I am only a couple states away right now... ;) I agree with your earlier comment. I think it is ok to be attracted to a particular "type" of person. I don't agree with people saying everyone should stay with "their own" though. Life is short. If you know what you like...go for it. From my experience, many black women are not sure how to initiate or develop a relationship with a white man. I say just do it. That's what I did. I grew up sheltered in a small town. After college, I worked with this beautiful girl named Kaye. She made it clear through co-workers she was very interested in me and that got my interest. I initiated and asked her out, we dated until she got a job tranfer she had to take. It was my first experience with a black woman, and it was great. Since then I would say 70% of the women I have dated are black. I can see myself marrying a black woman someday. I am still open to any race, however I find myself more attracted to and looking for my beautiful black bride!! All I can say to everyone is don't be a hater. I have experienced all the looks from blacks and whites that don't approve for some reason of interracial dating. Hopefully the smiles on our faces tell the whole story. It doesn't matter. If you are happy together, you have been blessed. Live well, love hard, and just enjoy the ride!!!

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        • Cynamyn82 says:
          Posted: 07 Feb 11

          I just viewed your profile and OMG! Your eyes are captivating. Like you said, the smiles on your faces tells the whole story. The only ones who have something negative to say about interracial relationships are usually very ugly on the outside, as well as the inside. A very secure person would not be bothered by mixed-race couples. They don't have to like it, but they must know how to mind their business and carry on with life.

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  16.   kissime says:
    Posted: 23 Dec 10

    BLKPRIDE, NOPLAYER, EDDYREADY/BIGTEN, viator1: I want to thank you all for regarding the blogs with such respect. You all have always made your points without degradation. Your intellectual decadence shows true class. BLKPRIDE, though I think your approach may have been surprising, you have never expressed ugliness by nature. I appreciate your humility. And your acknowledgment of how things can be at a balance shows the man that you are. I would really like for you all to engage in these conversations–for I can only communicate effectively with men and women of great nobility. Sincerely, Kissime

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  17.   Scoff/Sarah says:
    Posted: 23 Dec 10

    Dropping by to wish all a Merry Christmas and a Blessed New Year. The world is wonderful, so please take the time enjoy all of it's wonders. At this time of the year we must count our Blessings, and most of all give Thanks to our Beloved Savior Jesus Christ. Although the world is not perfect, we can strive to make it so, that is our given task. Thank you all so much for letting us share our story, Scoff and I Love each and everyone of you. Merry Christmas Scoff/Sarah

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  18.   Cynamyn82 says:
    Posted: 22 Dec 10

    I'm going to be VERY honest here. I read and hear plenty of people saying that love sees no color. That may be true for some, but not for others. In my case, that is not true at all. I CLEARLY see color and become attracted to it. As I have said on a few forums, I am attracted to men of a MUCH lighter hue, which is why I go for men outside my race, generally. I don't see this as a good or bad thing. It's just the way it has been for me since my childhood.....just my two cents :)

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    • ChocolatLadi says:
      Posted: 24 Dec 10

      I wish everyone on this site a Very Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year with your Mate and Loved ones. I'm still reading the comments and enjoying them. But you did not finish the Story:)

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      • Cynamyn82 says:
        Posted: 24 Dec 10

        LOL....there is no other part to the story that I can think of. I might have to do some digging if you want the rest. Happy Holidays to you as well ChocolatLadi :)

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    • Posted: 24 Dec 10

      Cynamyn82,That was not just two cents,that was a whole dollar ! Just keep following your heart,honey ! You will be alright. EddyReady cares!

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      • Cynamyn82 says:
        Posted: 24 Dec 10

        Thank you EddyReady! I will keep following my heart and refuse to cure the jungle fever I have. You do the same :)

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        • Posted: 01 Jan 11

          @Cynamyn82 The doctor just told me my jungle fever was terminal,i'm going to have to live with it forever ! Wow,what a way to go! SMILE.

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          • jerseyguy60 says:
            Posted: 13 Jun 11

            I date all cultures,but with that said I don't anyone should be traders to their own race...never for a second do totally disregard my own race of women for another...I think it's wrong and a cop-out,people who are just looking for an excuse to turn their backs on their own for another excuses excuse excuses,and it's just sad,

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          • Moxie981 says:
            Posted: 22 Aug 11

            I don't feel that I'm a trader to my race at all, so I disagree. I am attracted to Nice men. They are White.Their looks may make me notice them, but their hearts and positive actions toward me makes me want to stay and partner with them.Lots of Black men are Nice too- I am just not strongly attracted that way. I see attractive Black men online and on the street with all kinds of women, I truly wish all of them happiness with whoever they choose, I know what works for me. I'd rather get very real about what I want, and I feel that it's my choice, just like men have the choice to do whatever they want. Lying about it and eventually hurting Black Men, is the greater wrong. I'm glad to see Black Women like me wanting men to love them, looks are only part of the story. And another thing I never tricked anyone for money. I have my own money and want to share what I have. If you get with me your money will be invested and grow. Not all Black women have golddigger tendencies. I realize people will not agree with me and that's fine. I'm me and that's it.

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    • SugaSuga8 says:
      Posted: 12 Jul 11

      Thanks for your honesty! I must be honest as well I am extremely attacted to white men. It's not something I can change thats just the way it is. There are some very attractive brothers out there but I had to be real thats not what I like. I love every thing about white men - particularly their honesty (most of them), their affection, and the willingness to be themselves. I'm with you I like the lighter hue! There are some black men who only date white women and there are some black men who will only date black women. Why??? Because thats what they like.

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  19.   roadkingma says:
    Posted: 21 Dec 10

    I've dated black woman for the last 8-10 years now, And the reasons are simple. First and foremost, I just find them to be exotically beautiful. but it goes alot deeper than that, They do have an air of confidence that i find to be sexy. Also they seem to have the ability to break down the most complex problems to a point where it's almost easy to understand. I was engaged to a black woman who was my absolute soul mate, and by being open and honest, She gave me more insight to myself than i could have ever imagined, And I couldn't have loved her more. unfortunately for me and her, she passed away from cancer four years ago, I have never seen a more braver person than her. i miss her every single day. I only can hope when it's my time to go, I'll be as brave as her. GOD BLESS YOU MARY, I'll love you for ever.

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    • Mittens says:
      Posted: 13 Sep 11

      It's obvious how connected you were to Mary. I'm so sorry cancer took her away from you. I wish you a peace. :-)

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    • Ruth116 says:
      Posted: 29 Mar

      I'm so sorry about the loss of the precious love of your life, (HUGS). May you be blessed to find another.

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  20. Posted: 19 Dec 10

    Whether you choose to date within or outside your race (or both), it's all about what you are attracted to. Dating exclusively within or outside your race doesn't make one closed minded, it just makes the person more certain of what he/she want...unless the exclusivity is based on hate.

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    • Posted: 20 Dec 10

      Elegantbelle,i liked your comment.You hit the nail right on the head in your last sentence when you said......unless the exclusivity is based on hate..to go along with your comment,there are people on these blogs that are so upset with the fact that dating outside of your race is getting more popular that all they can do is down the women and men for doing it.They do not care if you are young, middle aged or elderly or where you are from,they have no remorse.There comments are,as you say,Elegantbelle.....exclusivity based on hate! Take care.

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  21.   BLKPRIDE says:
    Posted: 03 Dec 10

    @NOPLAYER...I TOTALLY UNDERSTAND! PERSONALLY I LOVE EVERYTHING ABOUT A BLACK WOMAN. I TRIED DATING OUTSIDE MY RACE AND FOR SOME REASON I FELT LIKE I WAS CHEATING. THAT EXPERIENCE MADE ME REALIZE WHY I LOVE BLACK WOMEN SO MUCH. THEY UNDERSTOOD ME BETTER. I'M ATTRACTED TO ALL RACES OF BEAUTIFUL WOMEN, BUT I'M CONNECTED TO BLACK WOMEN. IF FOLKS WANT TO DATE OUTSIDE THIER RACE MORE POWER TO THEM, ITS JUST IGNORANT TO DOWN YOUR OWN.

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  22.   kissime says:
    Posted: 02 Dec 10

    NOPLAYER , I accept your blessing

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  23.   kissime says:
    Posted: 01 Dec 10

    NOPLAYER , your words are of wisdom. ” If it wakes up next to you, that means you took it home with you!” Is a true statement. But sometime people have ways of deceiving. I've had patients called or come to the clinic crying after their mates have died-just finding out their mates lived double lives after being married for years. Though I think sometime one may rush to relationships, at times that's not the case at all.

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    • NOPLAYER says:
      Posted: 02 Dec 10

      @ kissime... You're right people do have a way of deceiving and we have no control over a mates decision to lie or be truthful but before you get too serious with a person you have to get to know them( though you'll never fully know them). Me personally, I have to spend alot of time around you and your family and those closest to you. I can tell alot about a person by observing them around their family and friends. I can tell by your bond with them if there's a potential for us to bond. If your attachment to those you love and the causes you believe in is stronger than your attachment to things then that says alot about you and your wiliingness to form and dedicate yourself to a serious relationship. I would pay special attention to how you treat the men in our family and how you relate to male friends or associates. It pays to be on the lookout for the "warning lights" but often times we'll let other things distract us from paying attention, such as good sex, physical attractiveness or the thrill of always having a goodtime and befrore we know it we'll end up attaching with a person that might not be the right one for us. I can honestly admit that when looking back on past relationship that ended on a sour note, it was due to my failing to see something that I should've paid attention to or I saw the signs but I got caught up in focussing on everything eccept the important things but you live and you learn and hopefully grow wiser as a result. Continue to be BLESSED!

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    • REESE says:
      Posted: 13 Aug 11

      I respect that you have realized that and learned from your mistakes. Most people don't so you are 10 steps ahead and most likely won't repeat them. Best of luck to you in your persuit for love and/or marriage.

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  24.   ZealAppeal says:
    Posted: 01 Dec 10

    What's more important than people being OK with interracial relationships is for white men to come together with black men and white women to come together with black women, as in brotherhood. Let us all put down the animosity, prejudice and preconceived notions. This climate of racial tension exists because people continue to "stick to their own". I know it's not easy to overcome what people have said (through stereotyping) if you're not accustomed to having relationships (friendships, not sexual) with those of other backgrounds. A lot of people have heard the phrase "to know me is to love me". How well do we know each other? How many lies have I subscribed to? How well do I know myself? We must be honest with ourselves and each other. Love is a powerful thing. The love (eros) between a man and a woman is a glorious thing that can't be diminished. I would like to submit to you what King David said of his comrade and brother Jonathon from 2 Samuel 1:26...I am distressed for thee, my brother Jonathan: very pleasant hast thou been unto me: thy love to me was wonderful, passing the love of women. This kind of love is not romantic love, but a brotherly love. Surpassing romantic love. King David and Jonathan may or may not have been of the same background. That's not the point, I am simply highlighting brotherly love. Can we identify that our brothers are not our enemy? My white brother, black brother, Mexican brother, Asian brother, they are not my enemies. Though some would be persuaded otherwise ( to blindly hate) , I have to be able to distinguish between the root cause of why a person may hate me and the person that is being used as a pawn to serve a hateful purpose or goal. I would like to communicate more at this time, but must cease. Can anyone hear this?

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  25.   BLKPRIDE says:
    Posted: 30 Nov 10

    @NO PLAYER.... THOSE WERE WORDS OF WISDOM! I DON'T SEE HOW ANYONE COULD DISLIKE YOUR COMMENT, YOU SPOKE LIKE A WISE MAN. KUDOS TO YOU BRO!

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    • NOPLAYER says:
      Posted: 02 Dec 10

      @ BLKPRIDE.... I feel what you say as well. I'm not against people dating or marrying who they want but the throat slashing is not required nor desired. I've tired for years to understand why we whip on eachother like we do and alot of it is reactionary and nothing more than ego-defense mechanisms at work. I'll give an example, lets take Ron a brother who exclusively dates Latinas and never misses a opprotunity to point out all the reasons why he wont date a BW. It's not enough for him to date his Latina and be happy but he always has to point out everything he see wrong with BW as justification for him doing so. We have to look at his always focussing on BW because it says something about him, thats why they say, "when you want to know whats in a person's heart you listen to the words that come out of their mouth." It's obvious that he harbors some resentment and animosity towards BW, it's possible these feelings come from past disappointments in relationships or from some traumatic experience in his life at the hands of BW but regardless of what happened he has internalized it and as a result it has left him feeling inadequate. To compensate for these feelings of inadequacy he dates those he perceives as somehow being better or superior than the object of his resentment, it's his way of saying, "I'll show you and how ya like me now!" So his attraction to Latinas is not a pure attraction it's a compensitory attraction. IMO I think what he's saying deep down inside his soul is, " I want the love, admiration and respect of BW! I want to feel competent, wholesome and powerful." He's screaming this from the mountain top but no one is hearing him. In his fustration and disappointment he's lashing out at BW because he finds it easier thatn dealing with his internalized feelings of not being good enough, he's a good brother but he's allowed an outside agent to convince him that he's somehow deficient and "as a man thinks so is he!" He exclusively dates Latinas as a way of boosting his deflated ego, distorting reality and attemping to say to BW, "I'm worthy and she's proof of it!. This brother is palying games and he's wasting his and her time. He's not in love he's in rebellion, he's no different than a child having a temper tantrum over some need being unfulfilled and he's gotten some unsuspecting women caught up in his foolishness. It's not WHAT you do but it's WHY you do what you're doing that'll determiine it's legitimacy. If it's not real it's phony, if it's not the truth it's a lie but it is what it is! LMAO Peace

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      • Queenui says:
        Posted: 04 Mar 11

        Well said sir!

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      • kevand says:
        Posted: 15 Apr 11

        i've been exposed to a lot of the talk that we as a people bash one another with...i've seen the stereotypical views in movies and have heard them on records also...one that comes immediately to mind is for colored girls..and article pointed out that all of the contributing writers come from multiple failed relationships and divorces..it seems to run rampant in our race. also noting that one of the main reasons for divorce is finances..we as a disenfranchised group have not been aforded the justice as international law would apply in reparations. other groups in america and abroad have had this application of law applied when it was due. we as black males have never been in control of our economical destiny ..therefore are not viewed as good providers in most situations...we still remain the last hired first fired. this brings to mind the willie lynch letter, whether real or not we are witnessing the effects...movies and songs that speak out about how some black males respond to the results what has been imposed upon the family is highlighted in our music and movies often times..essence spoke of this because when the person that bought essence first bought it..his first article was about how black women are lonely because they limit their choices to black men only. i have pulled up blogs where sisters are denouncing and disengaging their relationship with essence because of the black male bashing that it does. since i was a kid, i always heard the expression to empower the black woman and never really heard balance of the same for the black male.. deeper still to hire a black woman over a black male represents two birds with one stone...for she is a double minority..she's female and she is black...deeper still the doctrine that i've read in paper that i've seen distributed is to...learn their lingo, gain their trust, sex the women, water down the seed...khemet if you are not aware, is where the slaves in america came from...this area belongs to the circle of kush..which entails ethiopia, erittrea, sudan, and khemet...which is now called egypt, since the greek , roman, and arab, infiltration. i do have to wonder what is the take of those aware...that had the people of our race had been afforded the application of the law of repairing for damages as the jews experienced 5 billion dollars for 14 years, how many of our black males would be sitting in prison earning the state 500 dollars per head per day for that particular state where they are imprisoned. had the application of geneva law...as in reparations been applied, how many would have or could have turned out to be doctors, lawyers, engineers, or whatever gift or talent that he desired to cultivate and refine...as the jews did. when i saw the movie i think i love my wife and they had a conversation at dinner about how blacks should do like the jews...they failed to mention that difference of application of the law. our families are financially frustrated, stressed out, and living in fear of not knowing where the next meal is coming from. if you study the works of people like delbert blair, ray haggin, phil valentine, dr. john henrik clarke, sara suten seti and the likes, we come to knowing more about ourselves than what history tells us. incidentally we only have a month for black history...not enough for our contributions to many of the societies that have benefited from our sufferings. i am an advocate of women and men being equals to serve as each other's balance in this thing called life as they search for this thing called love...if one desires another from an outside race..so be it...but it is troubling to hear it put that black men are not good providers and things that speak of his frustrated position economically...it's as if a system castigated him then ridicules him for being what appears to his woman as destitue...without application of law....there are those that would say that happened so long ago...so did that law...and it has also been applied to the american natives...and the japenese world war two slave encampment detainees....personally to me...it's almost like a man throws junk and clutter in my yard then tells my woman she can do better than a junky man like me...wow...is anybody out there.

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      • Reese says:
        Posted: 09 Aug 11

        I will also add that sometimes when they say all black, white, asian men/women did this to me or cheated on me. Most of those people need to look at theirself and check out their selection process because whoevery you are dating you shouldn't always be being used, abused, cheated on or whatever. It is easier to blame the race of the indivisual than take personal responsibility for who you are picking One of my closest friends is PR she stopped dating latino men, then black men, then somoans. I told her she needs to look at why she keeps choosing the wrong men. She argued me up and down. Well hopefully she will figure it out before she runs out of races and becomes a lesbian. well said, but I do get concerned when I hear people say they are dating ir because they want their kids to be cute with light skin and good hair.

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      • fiesty88 says:
        Posted: 15 Aug 11

        I have never heard anything so well stated that lots of African-Americans (male and female) need to read! Bravo!

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  26.   NOPLAYER says:
    Posted: 30 Nov 10

    I've always said, "you don't have to date me but I'll be damned if I let you dog me"! BW (or anybody for that matter) shouldn't have to explain why they love whom they love, we have the right to love the one that's earned our love but we don't have the right to tear eachother down as a justification for loving who we love. I find it very suspect when a BM or BW has to find fault and place blame on another black person in an attempt to explain why they're dating or married IR, to me thats lame as hell and it says more about you as a person than it does the one that your're dogging out. It says: 1. You don't know how to select a mate and as a result you ended up being selected by someone that wrong for you 2. You find it easier to blame others than to take responsibility for the bad choices you've made in your love life 3. A quote from gandma, " If it wakes up next to you, that means you took it home with you!" I'll leave that alone! LMAO I think many of us don't trully understand the power of the spoken or written word, how many of us have heard, " and the word became flesh", meaning that words become things in due time. Words are like the seeds that you sow and one day you'll have to come back to reap those words that you put out there. Some of the things we say about eachother is beyond hurtful it's to the point of being disgraceful. It's trully speaks to our ignorance, it's one thing for others to tear you down but when others can sit back drink a coke and eat a bag of popcorn and enjoy the show that we put on, it's pathetic. I know some of us do these things out anger, fustration and resentment in response to not feeling valued, respected or loved by eachother but we have to look beyond our pain and get to the source of our pain. We've been engaged in a battle of psychological warfare from day one in this country and the world over as black people and you'd expect assaults to come at you from the outside but it seems that these blows are more damaging when they come from those that you would normally look to shield you from those blows. It's one thing for the world to say how great you are but let your mother / father, sister / brother or wife / husband tell you, "you aint shit" then the admiration of the world means nothing to you. "And the word became flesh" It's very difficult to try to love those that are constantly tearing you down, it's like they team up with your enemies and they work non-stop to berate you. Is it any wonder why some of us are so bitter hateful towards eachother. As a BM I know what this world has put on us and how we sometimes in our ignorance can become an accompliss to damaging ourselves sometimes beyond repair, so I clearly understand that we're not whole and we're not what hour Creator made us in the beginning and if I understand this, that means I have to assist in the restoration process. Whatever your issues are, I have a responsibility not to piont them out before the world but to cover you and to keep the world from looking in and down on you while you're in the process of healing, thats what the hood in the term brother / sisterhood is about, it's about covering, shielding and protecting your brother or sister from hostile outside elements in the environment. When we tear into eachother and lable eachother we don't assist in the healing processs we only rip open the wounds and as a result we cause eachother to act out in response to that pain. Next time you want to open your mouth to tear a brother or a sister down ask this question, WHY? Why are they angry, overly sensitive, defensive, emotionally distant, unwilling to open up, distrustful, unable to commit, insecure and a whole list of others. What societal factors; social, political economic, or educational may have played a part in shaping this person's present reality or do you believe that Black people are just f*cked up naturally. Many of of know what lies at the root of many of our relationship issues as black people, we know how many of these problems came to be but many of us find it easier to attack eachother than to deal with the reality of our issues and many of us just lack a knowledge of self to even begin to understand why we have some of the problems that we have when trying to relate to eachother. I find it funny that so many of us on the IR scene want to embrace, heal and restore the world and love everybody else on the planet but remain fragmented and hateful of our ethnic counterpart. Charity begins at home so why not love? I'd also feed a hungry child or a dog for that matter but not if it would mean one of my children or my own dog would go hungry, now thats love for ya but most important it's common sense.

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  27.   kissime says:
    Posted: 30 Nov 10

    Attachment between me and black men is inevitable. I exist because of a black man. No one should ever question the love I have for my people and for myself. Attachment between me and the human race is beautifully unfathomable. I would nurse a motherless child. What would you do if you had 900 days to live? No need to reply to my question. Contemplating wouldn't hurt

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  28.   NOPLAYER says:
    Posted: 29 Nov 10

    These topics are like landmines, one wrong step and boom! I like these topics because they have a way of forcing people to show their hand. They say drunks and mad people are very honest and by reading some of these comments some of you are telling some painful truths. The fact that these topics become so heated between BM and BW is a tell all sign that there remains an attachment between us even after all of the pain we inflict upon eachother out of our anger and fustration at not being able to get what we want from eachother. People that no longer care dont waste their time arguing and trying to come to some kind of understanding, no matter how fustrating the process might be, when they've given up, they shut up and get to moving. I've found BM and BW who say they exclusively date IR that can really bring the heat during one of these discussion and these are people who claim to have no interest in dating a brother or a sister but they really lay it out on the table when the topics comes up, trust me folks there's more to it than some of are willing to admit. So lets see if we can use some of this energy in a more positive manner and try to open up and really get to the heart of the matter. I'll be back! Peace I

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  29.   BLKPRIDE says:
    Posted: 29 Nov 10

    ....May i also add that WEDLOCK is not an indication of black men not taking care of their offspring, so those stats serve no purpose in that agruement. Many black men as do white men are not married to the mother of their offspring(s) and still play a posititve role in their child(ren)'s life. It seem to me that you are reaching to paint black men as evil and white men with more superiority. The very definiton of racism: a belief that some races are by nature superior to others. SOUNDS FAMILIAR!

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  30.   BLKPRIDE says:
    Posted: 29 Nov 10

    I question the reasoning of this poster to make comments about white racist Willie Lynch in the discussion about why black women only date white men......This smacks of an obvious attempt to guilt trip black women who choose to love white men. Guilt trip, never crossed my mind, but it is obvious that it did yours Once again! I spoke because of the many negitive comments being posted by black women who chose to date white men about black men. These comments are what made my Willie Lynch post necessary! It had nothing to do with GUILT. The Willie Lynch theory is no longer theory it is reality and your post is the proof of this reality("The fact that white men possess traditional family values is a great selling point.") ("The latest statistics state that 72% of black children (not biracial) are born out of wedlock."). WEDLOCK Change is need! I am a big brother to many young black males in my comm(unity). As a 30yr black man with no kids and a great knowledge of self; i plan to be apart of the change. What are YOU doing to encourage change? I forgot that was you last statement on the issue. I apprciate your particapation in this discussion. Blessing and Love!

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  31.   kissime says:
    Posted: 28 Nov 10

    BLKPRIDE your initial comments did not convey peace. The part of history you brought suggested anger. There is absolutely nothing wrong with anyone wanting to stay within their race or be with another. Your comments were bricks to my face & therefore, caused us to -once again lost in translation (for the most part-hopefully) When I was 6 months pregnant I was hospitalized twice. I was told by my physician there was a high chance of miscarriage. We were devastated. All we wanted was to have our baby boy which was already named a week within our 1st date-a year before conceived. I remember walking out of the hospital and being winced at by a black man (the dirtiest look I've ever gotten) because my husband at the time was holding me & it was obvious we were pregnant, and the father is a white man. It is great to be proud of your heritage. And sharing it with the world positively is highly appreciated. But constantly having people's dislikes thrown on your face masked as pride is not needed. At a time of possibly losing my unborn child at 6 months of pregnancy- the look of disgust, the pride one claims in order to hold on to hate and used to make me feel uncomfortable, obligated, unworthy, a traitor, guilt, is never gladly accepted-if gladly or accepted should ever be a perfect fit within the line of sentence within the unacceptable acts of hatred. You are not the first nor will you be the last to be proud of your race and your rich history. You are not the first nor the last to try to make one feel ashame because you can not control the affair of the heart. My message was a state of urgency truthful to my heart. And it was not intended to attempt to change your heart. Nevertheless, your agreement suggest your heart may not be too proud to hold on to the darkness I orriginally believed based on your pasted truth of evil in disguise-- as a man from 1772. So, I think you for a little breath of sunshine. ...oh, I enjoy writing and, at time a little excitement runs away with the pen (in this case,my fingers) But honestly, the label should not be a bother when you know the truth. Good Luck in finding the love of your life. Your African Queen, I'm sure will love you dearly. Kissime.

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  32.   SS says:
    Posted: 28 Nov 10

    I find it very telling when someone with the moniker Blkpride chooses this forum to express his views about the black community. We all know that quite a bit of black women only date black men and a few date non-black men let alone white men. I question the reasoning of this poster to make comments about white racist Willie Lynch in the discussion about why black women only date white men. The few black women dating non-black men are in no way destroying the black community. This smacks of an obvious attempt to guilt trip black women who choose to love white men. If you asked me the destruction of the black community could be attributed to the failure of black men to protect and care for their own offspring (Willie is truly rejoicing). The latest statistics state that 72% of black children (not biracial) are born out of wedlock. If anyone is truly serious about fostering black pride then the first place would be to start with the fathers of these kids as well as the kids themselves. This would be my last statement on this issue. I choose to date white men because I am attracted to white men. The fact that white men possess traditional family values is a great selling point.

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    • BLKPRIDE says:
      Posted: 29 Nov 10

      I AM TRULY SORRY FOR THE IGNORANCE OF ANOTHER MAN! YOU SHOULD NEVER MAKE ANYONE FEEL GUILTY ABOUT THEIR DECISION. THAT IS NOT MY AIM OR MY GOAL. YOUR KIND WORDS ARE GREATLY APPERCIATED! MUCH LOVE!

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  33.   BLKPRIDE says:
    Posted: 28 Nov 10

    @KISSIME I AGREE WITH EVERYTHING YOU SAID IN YOUR COMMENT. PERSONALLY I HAVE BLACK FRIENDS, WHITE FRIENDS, HISPANIC FRIENDS....ETC TO LABEL ME HATEFUL AND RACIST IS EXTREME. I GOT LOVE FOR ALL!!! HOWEVER, I AM VERY MUCH INTERSETED IN THE RICH HISTORY OF MY PEOPLE AND I PLAN TO ADD TO THAT RICH HISTORY. IF A GERMAN OR IRISH PERSON WANTS TO KEEP THEIR HERITAGE ALIVE THAT DOES NOT MAKE HIM/HER RACIST OR HATEFUL. IT MAKES THEM PROUD!!! PROUD TO BE WHO THEY ARE AND SHARE IT WITH THE WORLD. SO WHY DO I GET THAT LABEL???

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  34.   kissime says:
    Posted: 28 Nov 10

    BLKPRIDE, I have expressed my opinion about the black women who has disrespected black men. I believe that too is self-hatred. It's not ever okay to generalize a whole race base on stupid individual's behavior. Women or Men upsetting the moral function of any race is to be questioned of their morals. Love is all around us-Love is within us. Have you ever been stab by a fellow man/woman? Sometime the one who has our back is the least expected. William Lynch, was a White slave owner, in 1712. He was the evil of his time-amongst others. My child shall not suffer because of my sins. The Rwandan Genocide Between 1970-74 Tutsi's murdere 250,000 Hutus. In 1994 the Hutu decided to seek revenge and killed the tutsi Minoriy. The Power group directed the genocide mass murder of an estimated 800,000 people over the course of 100 days. The point: Evil-Begets-Evil My child should not suffer because of their sins.

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  35.   BLKPRIDE says:
    Posted: 27 Nov 10

    HATE??? LMAO NOTHING I'VE SAID HAS COMPARED TO MOST OF THE COMMENTS WRITTEN ABOUT BLACK MEN ON THIS SITE. EXCUSE ME FOR BEING DEFENSIVE KISSIME, BUT IF ANYONE SAYS SOMETHING NEGITIVE ABOUT BLACK WOMEN YOU WOULD BE AS WELL (AND YOU SHOULD). IT WAS THESE HATEFUL COMMENTS THAT PROMPT ME TO SPEAK. IF THIS IS A LOVE SITE WHY ALL THE HATE TOWARDS BLACK MEN? FULL OF PRIDE? MAYBE! HATEFUL? NEVER! I HAVE BEEN MAKING MY POINT AND NOT ONE TIME HAVE I DISRESPECTED ANYONE. NOR HAVE I CALLED ANYONE OUT OF THEIR NAME (UNLIKE SOME). JUST BECAUSE I HAVE A DIFFERENCE OF OPINION DOES NOT MAKE ME THE BLACK KKK. MAYBE YOU SHOULD PUT THAT LABEL ON SOME OF THESE WOMEN WHO ARE UP HERE TALKING NEGITIVE ABOUT BLACK MEN. THEY ARE THE ONES WHO ARE IGNORANTLY HATING THEIR OWN RACE. IF IT WAS BLACK WOMEN UNDER ATTACK I WOULD TAKE THE SAME STANCE. I'M OK WITH THE BACKLASH (PUN INTENTED) BECAUSE JUST LIKE I DO NOT SPEAK FOR ALL BLACK MEN, YOU ALL DO NOT SPEAK FOR ALL BLACK WOMEN. WILLIE LYNCHES SPEECH MY BE LONG WINDED BUT THAT DOES NOT CHANGE THE REALITY OF THE SPEECH. MY INTELLECT IS FAR FROM A SHAM; IT IS INSULTS LIKE THIS THAT I WOULD CONSIDER HATFUL.

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  36.   kissime says:
    Posted: 26 Nov 10

    BLKPRIDE , You're the black version of Ku Klux Klan. You're an extremist. Pride should be a pleasant, exhilarating, emotion. But the pride you display is a complex secondary emotion. The only love you have is of your own excellence. You have yet to master the true meaning of pride. You lack humility. The language-based interaction you're using is a form of Air-Spray. You're using negative psychology to trap people into your cult. You're full of fear and hate. ...You're old enough to know using Air-spray only makes crap smell like shitty-flowers--it's a combo. And it's not pleasant to our senses. Your pride is consider a sin. In the process of trying to manipulate black women into dating black men you're trying to cause damage-- for your own gratification. It seems you think by ill-treating others by bringing up history (when it is obvious you're not going back enough to make your point) to your own superiority the greater- because you are a hateful man. I know my history. I know of most of our history. The history of men kind-period. It has not been pretty. Your picture seems so peaceful. But you're not. Your writing gives away the amount of hate in your heart. Your pride is for satisfaction with meeting the personal goals set by yourself: To manipulate people into your beliefs This is an interracial dating site. Not a Cult recruitment site. And definitely Not a hateful site.

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    • SS says:
      Posted: 26 Nov 10

      Long- winded speeches about the Willie Lynch will still not distract black women from exercising their choices. It sounds like pseudo intellectual drivel.

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  37.   BLKPRIDE says:
    Posted: 26 Nov 10

    @NO PLAYER....I RESPECT AND AGREE WITH YOUR COMMENTS BROTHER, YOU STATED THEM WITHOUT IGNORANCE AND WITH UNDERSTANDING. MUCH RESPECT!!

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  38.   BLKPRIDE says:
    Posted: 26 Nov 10

    AFRICAN AMERICANS WILL NEVER HAVE THE SAME CLOSENESS THAT OTHER RACES DO BECAUSE WE WERE TAUGHT NOT TO. DO WHAT YOU DO; HOWEVER, YOU DON'T HAVE TO DOWN OTHERS(YOUR OWN) TO DO IT. BECAUSE THAT ONLY MAKES YOU LOOK LIKE A SELF HATING IGNORANT PERSON..... FOR THE OLD WHITE GUY WHO ASK ME WHAT I'M I TALKING ABOUT: THOSE WERE THE WORDS OF WILLIE LYNCH, WORDS THAT ARE VERY MUCH RELEVANT TODAY AS IT WAS IN 1712 WHEN HE GAVE THE SPEECH.

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    • Posted: 26 Nov 10

      BLKPRIDE,THANK YOU FOR CALLING ME THE OLD WHITE GUY.THAT'S ABOUT THE ONLY THING YOU HAVE SAID ON THIS SITE THAT MAKES ANY SENCE.I MAY BE OLD BUT I'M LIKE A BOTTLE OF FINE WHISKEY,I JUST GET BETTER WITH AGE,AND I DO KNOW HOW TO TREAT A BLACK LADY.MAYBE WHEN YOU QUIT BREAST FEEDING AND GROW UP,YOU WILL TOO!

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      • kissime says:
        Posted: 27 Nov 10

        EDDYREADY/BIGTEN, I don't think he'll ever grow up. Read between his cries.... He wrote "Tough titty but the milk's still good" he'll be flicking & sucking. As I've said...he sucked her dry. I'm usually kinder than necessary, because I know everyone is fighting some kind of battle. But you're messing up my chi. I've been single for almost 3 years---so you all know what that means. STOP BLOCKING!!!!

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    • kissime says:
      Posted: 26 Nov 10

      CLOSENESS THAT OTHER RACES DO is a broad statement . Adolf Hitler killed six million Jews. They were of the same race-White. The Yugoslav Wars: Europe's deadliest since World War II. The first since World War II to be formally judged genocidal. ..resulted in deaths of 140,000 people within 4 years! Below are Some of the wars of Europe: Anglo-Irish War Hungarian–Romanian War French Revolution Great Turkish War Italian Independence wars First Italian Independence Second Italian Independence War Third Italian Independence War Livonian War Napoleonic Wars Russian Civil War Russian Revolution Russo–Swedish Wars Swedish–Novgorodian Wars Russo–Swedish Wars Finnish War Spanish Civil War Turkish Invasion of Cyprus War of Austrian Succession War of the Polish Succession War of the Portuguese Succession World War I (1914–1918) World War II (1939–1945) Soviet-Japanese Border Wars Yugoslav Wars These wars have killed the spirits of humanity. Yes, I'm sure a lot of the older ethnic groups of the above wars are holding grudges against each other. I have a few Bosnian & Croatian friends. African Americans & Blacks in general--we have closeness. So stop trying to separate & conquer, BLKPRIDE. People like you are the reasons unnecessary wars continues. In addition, you better hope God bless you by allowing you to live to see the age 60. And hopefully you will not be disrespected & called an old man as if aging is a disgrace.

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  39.   NOPLAYER says:
    Posted: 25 Nov 10

    Why do some BW only date WM? " BECAUSE THEY CAN "! Regardless of their reasons, it boils down to them having the freedom to do so and with that said, we should leave it at that. As BM and BW some of us take others of us dating or marrying IR too personal, some of us see it as if we were rejecte because they didn't chose us and it's not so. I understand the natural possessiveness and positive jealousy that comes with belonging to an ethnic group and wanting to see your own togehter and making eachother happy and there's nothing wrong at all but lets face reality, some people will date and marry outside of their ethnic or cultural group. Me personally, I'm too busy to worry about why a sister is dating who she's dating. 1) I'm already married 2) It's no gurantee that had we met prior I would have wanted to date her or vice versa 3) By her dating who she's dating it leaves me free to experience the happiness that I've already found, so why should I be mad, there's no harm / no foul! People lighten up a bit, life is too precious and too short to dwell on why someone is dating or marrying someone outside of their ethnic group, go out there and find the one thats looking for you because they're out there and they maybe be from your own ethinic group and if not so be it, receive love from the one who wants to give it to you! I'm happy when I see my sister happy even if she's not with my brother ( that's who I'd love to see her with), I'm happy and I'm hoping that she's getting the love that she so rightfully deserves. No hatting going on here!

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    • Cynamyn82 says:
      Posted: 25 Nov 10

      @ NOPLAYER THANK YOU!!!!!! Coming from you, that comment is a breath of fresh air. People need to chill out and mind their darn business, instead of getting offended by the preferences of others.

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    • Cynamyn82 says:
      Posted: 25 Nov 10

      Oh and another thing....you're right. Some black women date white men only, because they can (and want to). Plain and simple.

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      • Posted: 26 Nov 10

        TRUE THAT,CYNAMYN82,BUT WHAT ABOUT NOPLAYER! THE MAN'S GOT HIS ACT TOGETHER! WHEN HE TALKS YOU WANT TO LISTEN,NOT LIKE THAT OUTER SPACE STUFF BLKPRIDE BE TALKING!

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    • kissime says:
      Posted: 26 Nov 10

      NOPLAYER , I've missed you. And I love you. It's so good to see you.

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  40.   BLKPRIDE says:
    Posted: 25 Nov 10

    THE BREAKING PROCESS OF THE AFRICAN WOMAN Take the female and run a series of tests on her to see if she will submit to your desires willingly. Test her in every way, because she is the most important factor for good economics. If she shows any sign of resistance in submitting completely to your will, do not hesitate to use the bullwhip on her to extract that last bit of [b----] out of her. Take care not to kill her, for in doing so, you spoil good economics. When in complete submission, she will train her offsprings in the early years to submit to labor when they become of age. Understanding is the best thing. Therefore, we shall go deeper into this area of the subject matter concerning what we have produced here in this breaking process of the female nigger. We have reversed the relationship; in her natural uncivilized state, she would have a strong dependency on the uncivilized male, and she would have a limited protective tendency toward her independent male offspring and would raise male offsprings to be dependent like her. Nature had provided for this type of balance. We reversed nature by burning and pulling a civilized apart and bullwhipping the other to the point of death, all in her presence. By her being left alone, unprotected, with the MALE IMAGE DESTROYED, the ordeal caused her to move from her psychologically dependent state to a frozen, independent state. In this frozen, psychological state of independence, she will raise her MALE and female offspring in reversed roles. For FEAR of the young male’s life, she will psychologically train him to be MENTALLY WEAK and DEPENDENT, but PHYSICALLY STRONG. Because she has become psychologically independent, she will train her FEMALE offsprings to be psychologically independent. What have you got? You’ve got the WOMAN OUT FRONT AND THE MAN BEHIND AND SCARED.

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  41.   BLKPRIDE says:
    Posted: 25 Nov 10

    YOU MUST KEEP YOUR EYE AND THOUGHTS ON THE FEMALE and the OFFSPRING of the horse. A brief discourse in offspring development will shed light on the key to sound economic principles. Pay little attention to the generation of original breaking, but CONCENTRATE ON FUTURE GENERATION. Therefore, if you break the FEMALE mother, she will BREAK the offspring in its early years of development; and when the offspring is old enough to work, she will deliver it up to you, for her normal female protective tendencies will have been lost in the original breaking process. For example, take the case of the wild stud horse, a female horse and an already infant horse and compare the breaking process with two captured males in their natural state, a pregnant woman with her infant offspring. Take the stud horse, break him for limited containment. Completely break the female horse until she becomes very gentle, whereas you or anybody can ride her in her comfort. Breed the mare and the stud until you have the desired offspring. Then, you can turn the stud to freedom until you need him again. Train the female horse whereby she will eat out of your hand, and she will in turn train the infant horse to eat out of your hand, also. When it comes to breaking the uncivilized, use the same process, but vary the degree and step up the pressure, so as to do a complete reversal of the mind. Take the meanest and most restless, strip him of his clothes in front of the remaining male, the female, and the infant, tar and feather him, tie each leg to a different horse faced in opposite directions, set him afire and beat both horses to pull him apart in front of the remaining. The next step is to take a bullwhip and beat the remaining males to the point of death, in front of the female and the infant. Don’t kill him, but PUT THE FEAR OF GOD IN HIM, for he can be useful for future breeding

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  42.   BLKPRIDE says:
    Posted: 25 Nov 10

    IGNORANCE IS BLISS.....LIVE BLISSFULLY!

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    • kissime says:
      Posted: 26 Nov 10

      Ignorance is not bliss. There are consequences to every action. Eventually one will deal with their ignorance. I know your heart pumps when doing the wrong thing--even the ignorant has a conscience. When we live our lives with love in our hearts because of what we all have learn in life-base on our individual history, we will live blissfully in knowing we are not hurting anyone because of who we love.

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  43.   BLKPRIDE says:
    Posted: 25 Nov 10

    I HAVE A FULL PROOF METHOD FOR CONTROLLING YOUR BLACK SLAVES. I guarantee every one of you that, if installed correctly, IT WILL CONTROL THE SLAVES FOR AT LEAST 300 HUNDREDS YEARS. My method is simple. Any member of your family or your overseer can use it. I HAVE OUTLINED A NUMBER OF DIFFERENCES AMONG THE SLAVES; AND I TAKE THESE DIFFERENCES AND MAKE THEM BIGGER. I USE FEAR, DISTRUST AND ENVY FOR CONTROL PURPOSES. These methods have worked on my modest plantation in the West Indies and it will work throughout the South. Take this simple little list of differences and think about them. On top of my list is “AGE,” but it’s there only because it starts with an “a.” The second is “COLOR” or shade. There is INTELLIGENCE, SIZE, SEX, SIZES OF PLANTATIONS, STATUS on plantations, ATTITUDE of owners, whether the slaves live in the valley, on a hill, East, West, North, South, have fine hair, course hair, or is tall or short. Now that you have a list of differences, I shall give you an outline of action, but before that, I shall assure you that DISTRUST IS STRONGER THAN TRUST AND ENVY STRONGER THAN ADULATION, RESPECT OR ADMIRATION. The Black slaves after receiving this indoctrination shall carry on and will become self-refueling and self-generating for HUNDREDS of years, maybe THOUSANDS. Don’t forget, you must pitch the OLD black male vs. the YOUNG black male, and the YOUNG black male against the OLD black male. You must use the DARK skin slaves vs. the LIGHT skin slaves, and the LIGHT skin slaves vs. the DARK skin slaves. You must use the FEMALE vs. the MALE, and the MALE vs. the FEMALE. You must also have white servants and overseers [who] distrust all Blacks. But it is NECESSARY THAT YOUR SLAVES TRUST AND DEPEND ON US. THEY MUST LOVE, RESPECT AND TRUST ONLY US. Gentlemen, these kits are your keys to control. Use them. Have your wives and children use them, never miss an opportunity. IF USED INTENSELY FOR ONE YEAR, THE SLAVES THEMSELVES WILL REMAIN PERPETUALLY DISTRUSTFUL. Thank you gentlemen.”

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    • Posted: 26 Nov 10

      BLKPRIDE,COULD YOU BREAK THAT DOWN INTO UNDERSTABLE ENGLISH,PLEASE.MAYBE YOU HAVE ALREADY BEEN TO CHOCOLATE09'S BLACK PLANET! YOUR TALKING IN OUTER SPACE!

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  44.   BLKPRIDE says:
    Posted: 23 Nov 10

    I AM NOT HERE TO ARGUE WITH YOU ABOUT YOUR CHOICE NOR AM I HERE TO SOUND SMARTER THEN YOU. I AM PURSING MY BACHELORS DEGREE. HOWEVER, I DO NOT DEFINE MY KNOWLEGDE BY WHAT I CAN LEARN IN THE WHITE MAN'S EDUCATION SYSTEM, THEY ARE ONLY TEACHING ME TO BECOME A WORKER FOR THEM. MY TEACHERS ARE THE LIKES OF PHIL VALENTINE, LENON HONOR, DR. SEBI...ETC GREAT BLACK MEN THAT UNDERSTAND OUR HISTORY GOES FAR BEYOND SLAVERY AND HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH CIVIL RIGHTS. MY KNOWLEDGE IS DEFINED BY WHAT I CAN LEARN ABOUT ME AND MY PEOPLE TO HELP OTHER. IT JUST SADDENS ME AS A BLACK MAN WHO LOVE BLACK WOMEN TO SEE BLACK WOMEN DOWN THEIR OWN MAKING. NEVER WILL I PUT A WHITE WOMAN BEFORE A BLACK WOMAN. THE BREAST THAT FED ME AS AN INFANT WAS OF A BLACK WOMAN AND THE BREAST THAT WILL FEED MY SEED WITH BE OF A BLACK WOMAN. I JOINED THIS SITE TO HAVE MY VOICE HEARD NOT TO PICK UP WOMEN. I HAVE NO PROBLEM IN THAT DEPARTMENT.

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    • chocolate09 says:
      Posted: 24 Nov 10

      Oh your voice was heard, but we aren't listening. The time you spent typing in this forum was a complete waste. Now run along to blackplanet.com. You will find plenty of black women who want black men there, since you have no problem in that department, haha. Not very man of us care what saddens you or who breast fed you, LOL.

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      • SS says:
        Posted: 24 Nov 10

        So he joined this site to harass women about their choices. Apparently we owe black men something simply because we share a similar phenotype.

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        • chocolate09 says:
          Posted: 24 Nov 10

          LMBO...SS you are funny and you are real!

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        • Posted: 26 Nov 10

          SS AND THE OTHER LADIES ON THIS SITE YOU ALL OWE NO MAN ANYTHING! JUST KEEP LOOKING AHEAD AND KEEP DOING WHAT YOU ARE DOING! YOU LADIES ARE DOING JUST FINE. IF YOU RUN INTO A BUMP ALONG THE WAY YOU SMOOTH IT OUT OR GO AROUND IT AND KEEP ON PUSHING! EVERYBODY KNOW'S BEHIND EVERY GOOD MAN IS A GOOD WOMAN SHOWING HIM THE WAY!

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      • kissime says:
        Posted: 25 Nov 10

        chocolate09, I CAN'T STOP LAUGHING!!! I'm in tears! :=p :..) :) I keep imagining a sad baby being breastfed

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        • Posted: 26 Nov 10

          KISSIME,CORRECT ME IF I'M NOT RIGHT HERE,BUT I THOUGHT ONCE YOU BREAST FEED A BABY THEY ARE SUPPOSE TO GO TO SLEEP. HOW COME BLKPRIDE IS STILL AWAKE! LOL!

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          • kissime says:
            Posted: 26 Nov 10

            I don't know, EDDYREADY/BIGTEN. Maybe she's not lactating. I think it's time for a Breast Pump!!! He probably sucked her dry I don't know about you all, but I find fussy babies extremely annoying! But this baby definitely needs to be MUZZLED!!!!

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        • TheGlassRose says:
          Posted: 28 Nov 10

          I'm laughing hysterically because I was thinking what you already typed! He is the classic example of why I don't waste my time with black guys.

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  45.   SS says:
    Posted: 22 Nov 10

    Black women are women first and foremost and like all women we are entitled to the men of our own choosing. We are not going to let rhetoric such “earth mother” etc detract us from choosing mates that meet our desires and standards.

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  46.   BLKPRIDE says:
    Posted: 22 Nov 10

    IT SADDENS ME TO SEE THE BLACK WOMAN MOTHER OF THE EARTH DOWN HER OWN MAKING.....IN A WHITE MAN SOCIETY A BLACK MAN DOESN'T STAND A CHANCE. YOU TAKE HIS WOMAN, YOU TAKE HIS WOMB, YOU TAKE HIS WOMB, YOU TAKE HIS LIFE...

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    • chocolate09 says:
      Posted: 22 Nov 10

      Well.....you better get used to seeing black women getting with and preferring men of other races (especially white men, because they are so HOT) if you are joining an INTERRACIAL dating site, LOL. You're hilarious!

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      • Posted: 26 Nov 10

        THANK YOU, CHOCOLATE09! NOTHING ELSE NEEDS TO BE SAID. WE MISSED YOU.GLAD YOUR BACK! KEEP UP THE GOOD WORK,BABY GIRL!

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      • TheGlassRose says:
        Posted: 28 Nov 10

        Ya'all are cracking me up like no tomorrow. Believe it or not, I saw not one, not two, but three interracial couples today and I was like so happy for each and every one of the black women that were with their loving, caring, sensitive, and sincere white men. One couple had a newborn baby and was coming home from the hospital, and that was such a beautiful sight. Another couple sat across the table from me while eating breakfast and his immediate family (mother, father, and sister) was starting the day off to treat his lovely lady to breakfast for her birthday, and the other couple was hugged up in a grocery store waiting in line. The word is out that the black women should connect with a white man if she wants to be in a meaningful relationship.

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    • Posted: 26 Nov 10

      VERY SAD COMMENTS ! BLKPRIDE? YOU MEAN TO TELL ALL OF US ON HERE YOU HAVE NEVER SEEN A SUCCESSFUL BLACK MAN IN YOUR SO CALLED WHITE MAN SOCIETY. I SEE THEM EVERYDAY! I BET IF THE TRUTH WAS KNOWN,YOU ARE NOT DOING TO BAD FOR YOURSELF,RIGHT NOW.

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    • bookitty123 says:
      Posted: 03 Jan 11

      How is it that black women belong to black men?

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      • Posted: 07 Jan 11

        @BookKitty123 Good point honey,nobody belongs to any body! It's called freedom! Freedom to make are own choices in life.EddyReady cares!

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  47.   Empress715 says:
    Posted: 07 Nov 10

    I ran across this blog while doing research online on Black women/beauty industry and then one link lead to another and lead to another and finally I came upon this. I have to say I was really taken aback by many of the comments made here, especially towards "white preference." I have to straight up declare my undying, deep, strong and powerful LOVE of African American men! I would NEVER ever bash them (publically on any forum, especially in front of white men) even when they are acting ignorant. This is my personal stance. I was raised in a diverse community where there were/are many people of different ethnicities, economic groups and social status. I was raised in a middle class family with family members ranging from very poor to extremely rich and have had opportunities to date men of different races. I have many family members whom I love dearly who are the product of "recently" mixed parentage. I am in no way close minded to interracial dating. After 15 years of love, devotion and marriage to a Black man which ended last year, I am open to dating men of any ethnicity. What is disturbing to me is reading comments heralding white men as "better" than men of color. It is one thing if you are open to meeting and dating a man with whom you connect nicely with irregardless of his race, as opposed to declaring an ultimate preference for white men. In my opinion, that would be an authentic way to approach dating. Putting black men down does not in anyway further your pursuit of love with white men so WHY DO IT? In some of the statements it's as if the person is trying to "put distance" between themselves and black men. As if to prove they are "other" than your ordinary black woman, thereby making you more "worthy" of being swept away and "saved" by your white prince. Coming here and reading the posts (save a few) my heart sank. Please, my Black Queens, in your quest for love do not forget that we have all been brainwashed with "white is right" mentality. That belief is deeply ingrained in the American psyche. Some here have said, "I've always been attracted to white men..." Well, yay! Of course! Look at the images in our society as to what is handsome, powerful, right... " we are bombarded with them night, day, 24/7 Sisters, date whomever you wish/want to date -- be happy. But don't step on black men on your way there. Also, have an open heart to receive a GOOD man, any good man -- not specify WHITE man. You may miss the opportunity for the right one if you do. PLEASE stop bashing black men! Signed, Loveblackmendearlybutwilldateanygoodmanregardlessofrace

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    • SS says:
      Posted: 17 Nov 10

      There is nothing wrong with having a preference and nobody needs to approve of the reasons for your preference.

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      • Posted: 19 Nov 10

        TRUE THAT SS.THAT'S WHAT BEING AN ADULT AND LIFE IS ALL ABOUT.IF WE MAKE MISTAKES WE LEARN FROM THEM.I THINK SOME PEOPLES PROBLEM IS THEY ARE MORE INTERESTED IN WHAT SOMEONE ELSE IS DOING AND THEY LET THEIR OWN LIFE SLIDE.

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    • socialbeing says:
      Posted: 05 Dec 11

      I actually agree with the point that I think Empress is making here. Yeah, I'm one of the women she addresses because I do have a preference but there's no need to make generalizations about entire groups of people. I may prefer white men, physically, in a lot of ways, but I know that they're not all great. Similarly, not all black men are bad. There are a few douche bags who keep contaminating this thread with their hatred (like you Anthony) but they don't represent the entire group. We don't need to stoop to the level of some of the negative men we've encountered by making hasty generalizations. I also have to admit that there may be some truth to her claim that this preference, for at least some of us, is influenced by the media. I wouldn't cite it as the main reason but that influence is impossible to ignore so there may something to it. However, the causes, whatever they may be and if they can be defined, don't have to invalidate our feelings. We like what we like so we act on it. It's that simple and there's nothing wrong with it :-)

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  48.   Leti123 says:
    Posted: 31 Oct 10

    Nothing wrong with liking someone who looks different_OPPOSITE ATTRACT_EVEN GOD DIDN'T LIK THE DISCRIMINATION AGAINST MOSES AND THE ETHIOPIAN AFRICAN

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  49.   chocolate09 says:
    Posted: 18 Oct 10

    Some of us only date white men because they are better.

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    • Anthony2012, says:
      Posted: 20 Oct 10

      I hope they date all of you because , It seperates the real from the fakes ..And the really attractive black women dont date white men....

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      • chocolate09 says:
        Posted: 24 Oct 10

        LOL....and the really attractive and secure black men don't feel the need to come here and make stupid comments about who black women date :) No wonder you were called a coon!

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        • Posted: 30 Oct 10

          WAY TO GO BABY GIRL! SPUNKY,I LIKE THAT! EDDYREADY/BIGTEN CARES!

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        • Cynamyn82 says:
          Posted: 08 Nov 10

          LMAO...chocolate09, your posts had me dying too. If it talks and acts like one, then that's what it is. I don't apologize for anything I said to him or any hateful imbecile.

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      • chocolate09 says:
        Posted: 24 Oct 10

        Oh and why do you care so much about what I'm doing with my account?? Again, another insecure and unattractive black man cannot fathom the truth I'm speaking. You have been told to go find other women who want black men, yet and still you harass the black women who prefer white men by saying stupid stuff?? LOL...I find that hilarious. You know that you can't measure up to white men when it comes to there looks and ability to hold a relationship and you are bitter about it. You have no game, Anthony!! If you did, you would not be here taunting black women who CLEARLY don't want you....SAD!!! Instead, you would go on about your business picking up other chicks on the site and in real life. Now go away!!! You cramping up our flow!!!

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        • Posted: 30 Oct 10

          KEEP TALKING SWEETHEART! STRONG BLACK WOMEN ARE SO BEAUTIFUL. EVEN WITHOUT A PHOTO! EDDYREADY/BIGTEN

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      • chocolate09 says:
        Posted: 24 Oct 10

        I take that back...you are not cramping up our flow. You are just making us laugh and making it harder for other black men to be taken seriously.

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        • kissime says:
          Posted: 25 Oct 10

          chocolate09, you are too funny....I can't stop laughing :) Doing laundry & checking the blog in search of entertainment...GOT IT! I'm tired of the.......... BLOCKERS too. Now....SHOO FLY!!!

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  50.   Kirurgen says:
    Posted: 12 Oct 10

    .Some white men - like me - adore the virtues and values that black women have. Compared to white women. Educated black men often are considerate too, but others take a black woman for granted. And request obedience. I love what these black women in here say. !. because they are considerate, and has a warm heart. Others don´t.. It all comes down to the person. I am so glad that more and more black women educate themselves, So that they get a proper appreciation of who they are. Gender roles are also so much more easy with a black woman. Which makes it a bliss to be with a black woman. Black women wants to be proud of their man. Which is natures meaning. We should respect and love each other for who we are. I love the Obama family for their devotion to each other. I have met so many black women who was molested by black family members or black men, that they would never consider a black man as a possible spouse. Love doesn´t have to do with color but respect, love and appreciation Some black women will abuse your kindness, but that is - to me- a matter of lack of self esteem. My white family are racists, but I have NEVER met that among black parents. My black women’s parents have respected me for who I am, and their father have been like brothers to me. . I try my best to be loving and caring, and don´t expect to understand all the choices and desires that my black woman have . But at the end of the day I know that she want us to be happy together. Black women can be tough on each other. But not on me. I´m a medical scientist, and neither a white or black women understand what I do. But a black woman appreciate that I do my best to make a difference, and my hard work. Praise be on the nature of black women. We laugh, have fun, and are still are able to be real. It is - to me- a bliss that a black woman hold on to her basic values. Yes black women can be stubborn if they have big responsibilities. ( I have a boy of seven with the former Chief of Finance in H-P. And she put her job before building a family and brought our son into foster care for 6 years.. That is just not acceptable to me. But a lot black women want to do their best. Also at their job. That was to much for me, since I loved her to death. ) I once landed a senior job for an African woman in an international company. She was greeted by the CEO himself, and presented as their new collegue, But she was too scared take a simple test, and was insecure about her own abilities. So I praise that a lot of black women get a descent comprehension of their own virtues, and educate themselves. BTW. Where has all the Goddess´s gone. ??. A black woman is often like a goddess to me, though I treat her as my beloved. Praise also to the initiatives to educate black women, especially in Africa. Since an educated woman will do her best to secure good health and prosperity to her children.

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