Sexual Addictions And Other Vices
People are more willing to admit that they have a bad habit (like smoking or eating too much sweets), but they shy away from saying that they are hooked or "addicted" to someone or something. Addiction is a dirty little word.
Addiction defined is a state of physiological or psychological dependency... that is liable to have a damaging effect. Call it what you want, addiction, habit, compulsion, dependence, need, craving. The internet has become the newest, most rapidly growing form of sexual acting out for many sexual addicts today.
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A lot of sexual addicts have added computer sex to their repertoire. They spend more and more time surfing the net, downloading and reading information, they swap sexual information and pictures with others in chat rooms or with a simple piece of technology (web cams) they are now also directing their own live sex shows on interactive sites. The internet just happens to provide many of the things sex addicts seek all in one place; isolation, secrecy, fantasy material, endless varieties, around the clock availability, and instant accessibility.
The following is a few patterns and examples of sexual addiction that I found surfing the net. If you think that you or someone you know suffers from a sexual addiction, do your homework, there is a lot of information available on-line. The first step is admitting there is a problem. But don't stop there...get help. Sex addicts on the internet often move quickly to more extreme behavior with taking greater risks in the real world. Look for the signs then look for help.
Patterns and examples of sexual addiction
1.Neglecting commitments because of fantasy life, excessive masturbation
2.Receiving money or drugs for sex
3.Paying prostitutes for sex, paying for sexually explicit phone calls
4.Extramarital affairs, flirting and seductive behavior
5.Patronizing adult bookstores and strip shows,
6.Peeping Tom or Exposing yourself in public
7.Having a large collection of pornography at home or at work
8.Engaging in sex with strangers, having one night stands
9.Using position of power to sexually exploit another person, rape
10.Using fetishes as part of sexual rituals, having sex with minors or animals.
Participation in any of the above mentioned examples does not make you an addict, or we'd all be one. The addiction comes from continuation of the behavior despite bad consequences, like losing your job, family, freedom or well being. Look for the signs...then look for help
Responses to "Sexual Addictions And Other Vices"
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ervien says:Posted: 22 Apr 07
Hi there,well at first i cannot believe someone can write a good article like this one.I'm guilty as hell cause i'm addicted that i can do it anywhere though i have to admit it's very wrong to be addicted to sex.
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mossimo36 says:Posted: 10 Feb 07
I agree..moderation is good. I know its an addiction for some the same as alcohol or anything else
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Bob says:Posted: 20 Dec 06
This is a reply to Sandra's comment: "Hi Guys, You have no clue what it is to go out with someone who has an addiction problem." You have no clue that there are also WOMEN who have sexual addiction problems, and that there are men out there who are trapped in abusive relationships by women who dominate them in and out of the bedroom, and these men are just as afraid as women are in the same situation. You sound like you are someone who is/was in one of these relationships, and as a male who was in the same situation before my divorce, I want you to know that I find it very sexist of you to assume that men have no clue what it is to be with someone who has an addiction problem. Please take this into consideration before making another angry comment like that.
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nehuskerfan says:Posted: 13 Dec 06
Interesting... However, I found the comments to this article more interesting than the article. Some very good points were made.
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Dannie says:Posted: 10 Dec 06
Although the article was interesting, it was not compelling. The article seemed and several comments were focused on male behavior. Women have this issue as well. And it is not always about the actual act of sex itself, but more the feeling or emotion it provides. The destructive behavior continues or has increases to intensity because it takes longer to achieve the feeling being sought.
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EMBRACEME says:Posted: 25 Nov 06
VERY INTERESTING ARTICLE.. HMM GOT ME THINKING WHAT AM I ADDICTED TO LOL..
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mossimo36 says:Posted: 21 Nov 06
Interesting article...very educational for me. Keep em coming!!
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Fala says:Posted: 10 Nov 06
Sexual addiction is a very serious problem for those affected and their families. Based on some of the other comments here, I don't think some people realize how just how devastating it can be. It's nota joke or every man's dream come true.
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ebonybeautyj says:Posted: 09 Nov 06
Everything in moderation,be careful here!
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Sandra says:Posted: 26 Aug 06
Hi Guys, You have no clue what it is to go out with someone who has an addiction problem.This is about spending 80% of your life's time and energy of planning how to implement fantasies into real life scenarios. It is about permanent conquest, cheating, lying, touching dependants, having sex in public a la George Michael, wanting to be caught in the act, at the hight of intimacy whispering to you that it is time to get the second woman into bed and that You are expectied to find the second woman quickly. The entire relationship is about sex while verbally he denies it, the language is abusive, it involves denigrating and humiliating women during sex, while taking a walk he will screen the environment for suitable bushes and trees, when passing a women he will openly admit that he feels like fucking her. Any sex session starts with him masturbating.It is only about his needs. Consciously he understands that you as his partner have your own sexual needs, which you would expect him to take into account but he is too busy with what he needs. He sees himself as a sexual animal and is proud of this identity. The guy shies away from social life, is unable to maintan or establish friendships with other males, he resents them because he feels inferior. His energy levels are very erratic, he is lethargic, moody and irritable.Incapable to love, highly ego-centric. This is not about believing that specific forms of sex are dirty, it is about a compulsive, highly destructive and desperate behaviour, hurting anyone who wants to love and help the person. There is treatment out there and I hope that those who can admit that they do suffer from this problem will take the initiative to get help. The level of pain this creates is huge.
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280z says:Posted: 15 Apr 06
If wanting to have sex all the time means, that you have an addiction, then I am guilty. I am constantly wanting to have sex. I enjoy it!!!!!!!!!
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Klax says:Posted: 10 Apr 06
Sex is purposely for enjoyment and reproduction by the two consenting parties. Believe me or not, you'll at one time agree with me....
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Mark says:Posted: 22 Mar 06
Many of the things you listed are dangerous. But they are after all one persons opinions. I want to know who the author of the article is. Who is the preacher in the pulpit? Is it a woman by chance? There is a danger of women running a dating site, because a large number of women tend to be anti male, anti sex, and limit free speach. Im still looking for a chat room and a dating site that truly allows free speech.
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Flava8304 says:Posted: 20 Mar 06
Hello there, how are you doing? Yes, I'm interested in this subject. I'm going to school right now for psychology and I want to become a clinical psychologist and I know I'm going to run into some sex addicts at some point in time. So, I definitely want to learn more about sexual addiction. Thanks, and have a nice day.
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Trond says:Posted: 20 Mar 06
I have the same problem, I am sexual addict and I live in norway and here they think it is the devil if you like sex, lets make a group and hang out together when we can, I have money to travel and meet you, sex and love keep together, coz it is more beautiful make love then just sex
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Butchie says:Posted: 19 Mar 06
I feel you. I do feel how ever my habit is not like that.I just love to connect with good people from here.
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Can there be a such thing as a complete non addict? Someone who finds sex disgusting. I think I met one of those a while back