Is the African American media obsessed with interracial dating?
"… nobody talks more about interracial dating than black folks."
These are the thoughts of Charing Ball on Madamenoire. She thinks Blacks are obsessed/infatuated with interracial dating. And why she thinks so is because of the high number of articles in magazines and blogs (targeting the black readers) that talk about dating white saying:
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"... you just don't see the topic broached in mainstream magazines like GQ or Vogue. You don’t see white therapists or white relationship experts or other white folks with alphabets behind their names and a platform, spouting the virtues of dating black men and women. Let's face it: when it comes to reporting about "Jungle Fever," this virus is only at epidemic proportions in the African American press... And if they are not expounding on your personal choice on whom you date, then they are highlighting all the wonderful interracial couples in Hollywood. " she adds.
Ok. Honestly, I have never thought about it that way. That whites don't speak much about interracial dating. Well, I went to GQ.com and did a search on "interracial"... Nothing came up. Did the same with Vogue.com and "Sorry, there were no results found for interracial". Even Cosmo had nothing. The lack of anything on interracial dating got me asking myself: Do we white folks NOT talk about interracial dating? That white relationship experts don't write articles about "the virtues of dating black men and women"; that we don't write guide books about snagging a black man; that our magazines don't feature interracial couples? Ok! I think I am going to make it my mission to come up with something. But even if I do, Ball is talking about the "epidemic" levels which to be honest, I don't think I will come across such levels...
But if her thinking is true, why this so?
For ball, this much talk about interracial dating - dating white especially - makes her wonder: "If the color of the person we choose date doesn't matter, why do we talk about it so much?" Could it be white media don't report much about it because color doesn't matter or it matters so much we don't wanna talk about it?
"... obviously these stories are very popular, which is why these publications continue to put them out. After all, stories mean page clicks, and page clicks equates to dollars. And if there are folks willing to read it than you can place the blame solely on black media for continuing to cater to their audience," she says.
Well... maybe its the white audience we are lacking. Right? ;-)
7 responses to "Is the African American media obsessed with interracial dating?"
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Reese says:Posted: 11 Oct 12
I don't think it is just black magizines because I have seen a lot of articles about Asian interracial dating. Maybe just minorities because I agree that white media can't really discuss the subject the same way. I don't know maybe other groups discuss it, but I never have read some of the other articles that are Native or latino based. But I think people need to get over it and just look for happiness for yourself.
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littleturtle says:Posted: 08 Oct 12
I don't think the issue rests solidly along cultural lines. There are gender, geographic, and educational considerations as well. I would wager a bet the gender of the person responsible for publishing these articles weighs heavily on the subject matter. For example, I am a 44 year old white female...so I have been told. I'm adopted so I really don't know what I am on my father's side. When I am out with a black man, it is only the black females that appear to have a problem with friendships/relationships outside of their race. One time I was walking into a retaurant with my date (a black male) and a black female was walking in the door opposite of us at the same time. As soon as she saw him behind me she gave me the DIRTIEST LOOK! Well, a second later, behind her, I saw an old friend I used to work with (a black male) and as soon as he saw me we ran up to each other and gave big hugs. She and my date looked at each other and said, " Apparently they know each other". At that point, everything was okay. But why wasn't it okay before she knew I was friends with her FATHER? Regarding geographical variances of opinion, I grew up in Chicago (midwest United States). I was adopted by a Lutheran minister and his wife and have a Japanese brother (also adopted. He was the first interracial adoption in the state of Virginia, BTW). Growing up, my best friends were Asian, black, Hispanic, and Jewish. I did not know color because I was not TAUGHT color. Prejudism is a learned behavior. I now have two white nephews with black wives, a black nephew with a white finace', a Japanese niece, a Philipino step-son, and mutiple, beautiful mixed grandchildren and grand nieces and nephews. I may not have this wonderful life if I had grown up in the south, where I now reside. I understand the history of America and can understand why our older generation still feels like they are on the outside looking in. I see no excuses for our younger generation, though, as they are equally afforded the same rights and responsibilities - black, white, yellow, red, all of them. They will make the future what they choose to make it. My choice to date outside my race does not mean I will not date WITHIN my race. It is simply my belief that all people are equal and we are only a few shades of skin color from each other. Scientifically, BTW, we are varying shades of orange...all of us, not black and white. This is where education comes in. Why would I choose to date only within my "color" when I know there are many people from all races who have similar interests, career fields, educational goals, etc? I seek to educate, not devalue, people who are misinformed on these matters. In my line of work (police officer and college professor), I deal with people from both ends of the spectrum and everywhere in between. It may not be possible to change everyone's thought process, but it is possible to make them think about the possibilites. And when you can get them to think outside the box, there is unbridled potential to change policies that affect he way people behave...and that, will eventually, change the way people think.
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Niyree says:Posted: 08 Oct 12
Any issues concerning race is a touchy topic. In todays contemporay society, it appears where interacial dating from the perceptive of the black woman dating out of HER race is concerned, it is more widely discussed. In retrospect, the catch 22 in it all rests in the fact that alought it can be discussed openly these days, it appears to be (still) an underlying desire for proving its legitimacy at any given chance.. Almost like its accepted, but moreso in a legal sense as opposed to a moral sense. And in view of the latter, this is where the extreme youtube videos, web topics etc get there fuel from.. such doubt! Suffice it to say, I do not see dating as anything but that! But it seems the world relies heavily upon lables.
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honeybee324 says:Posted: 08 Oct 12
White media can't discuss interracial relationships the way that black media does because then it would have to address historical and contemporary issues around interracial relationships during slavery, miscegenation, stereotypes, structural racism, etc. It's a messy conversation to begin with, and white media is not equipped to handle it. If you don't believe me, just Google the recent foolishness with the Euro mag calling Rihanna the N word or how long it's taken USAmerican women's mags to feature black models/dark-skinned black women on their covers and you'll see that they're nowhere NEAR ready to broach the subject of interracial relationships.With the exception of a few niche sites, most of the black media discussing interracial relationships are discussing their internal struggles with it - media depictions, racialized consciousness/identity, internalized racism, etc. It's irrational for people born and raised in the US to believe they are "colorblind". As much as you'd like to believe and behave otherwise, our consciousness has been racialized one way or the other. The fact that we have to have a site like this in the first place speaks to that racialization of our identity and consciousness. A few years ago, a popular dating site shared the trends of their members, everything from the standard demographics (age, sex, interests) to who was more likely to get page views/requests by people of a different ethnicity(white men, Southeast Asian women) versus who was least likely to be approached by someone of another ethnicity (black women). It's 2012 and folks still get dirty looks? We still have a ways to go emotionally and spiritually. smh
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Optimists says:Posted: 04 Oct 12
So I would suppose, where are the examples of it being popularized by black media? I'm truly curious because I don't know of them, none of the black women I date steep myself into black media, if anything they distance themselves away from it and I can't say that it's based on a media influence. *shrug* I only know my Happy, Happy Experiences <3 As a white male, I feel too colorblind to extol the virtues of dating black women.. I mean, I love Strength, Independence, and Attitude.. something I find more to my liking in them, but I'm not sure that's a virtue of the ethnicity, and so I wouldn't say that it's just black women I want to date.. I just find myself happiest with them <3 I've only had this in a fairly conservative town, where we get looks and ill words, I got some today, I just held her closer and told her their opinions don't matter :p and here atleast, I don't think it's something anyone talks about, good or ill, it just happens. I think this represents a viewpoint of white media as a whole, why talk about it? People feel, mixed about it.. And I don't think people want to either say that it's Ok and Great because they're black.. Or that it's OK and Great because they're people.. Perhaps because the whole tag "interracial" loses it's appeal when it's the former, just people.. which is the important bit anyway I think.. That we're all the same, and to say one's better than another, could just polarize us more than we need it to. So it's hush hush, except.. I will say, there's a certain media push that says White women and Black Men.. Well you heard the saying.. Go black, never go back. But I feel that's more of an undercurrent relating more to sexual conduct and found in porn rather than highbrow magazines who strive to be P.C.
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QTpie1968 says:Posted: 04 Oct 12
You certainly made some some very good points in this article. I had never thought about this issue before, so it's definitely something to think about.....
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I tell everyone I know the benefits of dating black women. I love everything about them from the way they talk to the way our skin contrasts eachother. I love the diversity they bring into my life. I feel white media has some hurdles to jump before being able to delve into the subject, the more the average white community talks about the benefits the sooner the media will make those hurdles.